Names you should probably not name your baby

My dad said you guys were probably kidding when you said to send you name ideas, but I really like names (like "I'm subscribed to a forum about names" level of liking) and I have little self control so...I'm sorry. Full disclosure: these probably aren't practical for real, human children and I do not actually expect you to use any of these. This is actually a pretty self serving list, if I'm being honest. Congratulations on your tiny human!!!
  1. Henry
    • Origin:

      German
    • Meaning:

      "estate ruler"
    • Description:

      Henry is well and truly back in style. The classic returned to the Top 10 in the US in 2021 for the first time in over a century, and as of 2024, sits at Number 6. Like James and Theodore, Henry is a strong, traditional name that also manages to feel stylish and gentle.
  2. Milo
    • Origin:

      Latin and Old German
    • Meaning:

      "soldier or merciful"
    • Description:

      Milo is most commonly considered to be Germanic name derived from the Latin word miles, meaning "soldier." However, there is evidence to suggest it also may have independently spawned from the Slavic root milu, meaning "merciful." Milo predates brother name Miles, a variation that evolved when the name immigrated to the British Isles in the Middle Ages. Mylo is an alternate spelling.
  3. Ezra
    • Origin:

      Hebrew
    • Meaning:

      "help"
    • Description:

      Ezra has a lot going for it: the strength of its heroic Biblical legacy, its quirky sound, and its fresh but familiar feel. Ezra is now at its highest point ever, but its intuitive streamlined spelling and deep roots could make it a worth successor to Elijah in the Top 10 -- or even to Liam or Noah at Number 1.
  4. Sebastian
    • Origin:

      Latin from Greek
    • Meaning:

      "person from ancient city of Sebastia"
    • Description:

      Sebastian is an ancient martyr's name turned literary, and Little Mermaid hero—think Sebastian the Crab—that's more popular than ever, as a classic-yet-unconventional compatriot for fellow British favorites T Theodore and Oliver.
  5. Benjamin
    • Origin:

      Hebrew
    • Meaning:

      "son of the right hand"
    • Description:

      Benjamin is a biblical name that has enjoyed widespread favor for decades, ranking in the US Top 50 for almost half a century and the Top 10 from 2015 until 2023.
  6. Fletcher
    • Origin:

      English occupational name
    • Meaning:

      "arrow-maker"
    • Description:

      Fletcher is a common surname with a touch of quirkiness; it definitely fits into the So Far Out It's In category--and moving further in all the time along with other occupational names from Parker to Forester.
  7. Florian
    • Origin:

      Latin
    • Meaning:

      "flowering"
    • Description:

      If Flora and Florence have returned full force, Florian, with its trendy Latinate ending, could also have a chance. Popular in Germany, Austria, Switzerland, Poland, and France, St Florian was the venerated patron saint of those in danger from water and the patron saint of firefighters.
  8. Leander
    • Origin:

      Greek
    • Meaning:

      "lion-man"
    • Description:

      Leander was once an almost unknown name, however, with the popularity of Leo and the rise of Leandro, it now feels like a perfectly accessible alternative to Leon or Alexander. In Greek legend, Leander was the powerful figure who swam across the Hellespont every night to visit his beloved Hero, a priestess of Venus.
  9. Calder
    • Origin:

      English
    • Meaning:

      "rocky water"
    • Description:

      A cool, rugged sounding name, Calder is connected to an ancient Scottish clan, an English village, and a Scottish River, along with the sculptor Alexander Calder, who invented the mobile (as in, kinetic sculptures powered by motors or air). Meaning "rocky water" or "stony river" in the ancient Brittonic language, it makes a creative yet outdoorsy choice.
  10. Wylie
    • Origin:

      English
    • Meaning:

      "from Wylye"
    • Description:

      Wylie is a friendly, nonchalant rodeo name with an almost irresistible charm; parents may pick up on its pleasant similarity to the more popular, unisex Riley. Although more masculine, we see Wylie as working as well for boys and girls (Richard Anderson used it for his daughter in 1999). Wylie (or the interchangeable Wiley) can also be an original and authentic way to honor an ancestral William. We don't, however, recommend you spell the name the way Corey Parker did: Wylei. Why lay?
  11. Poe
    • Origin:

      English
    • Meaning:

      "peacock"
    • Description:

      An evocative unisex one-syllable name, Poe is most distinguished by its literary reference. Edgar Allan Poe was an influential American author and poet, credited with inventing the genres of detective and science fiction, which might provide inspiration for parents who are fans. And now its choice as the name of the hero played by Oscar Isaac in the new Star Wars movie is sure to catapult it from literary choice to major favorite.
  12. Kermit
    • Origin:

      Irish, variant of Diarmaid/Dermot
    • Meaning:

      "without injunction, without envy"
    • Description:

      Kermit was a Top 500 name until the 1960s, not coincidentally the decade in which Kermit the Frog made it a one-person (well, one-frog) name.
  13. Inigo
    • Origin:

      Basque, medieval Spanish variation of Ignatius
    • Meaning:

      "fiery"
    • Description:

      Inigo, almost unknown in the U.S., is an intriguing choice, with its strong beat, creative and evocative sound, and associations with the great early British architect and stage designer Inigo Jones. The sixteenth-seventeenth century Jones shared his name with his father, a London clockmaker, who received it when Spanish names for boys were fashionable in England, especially among devout Roman Catholics.
  14. Calloway
    • Origin:

      English from Latin
    • Meaning:

      "pebbly place"
    • Description:

      Calloway is one of those irresistibly jaunty, animated three-syllable surnames, like Sullivan, Rafferty and Finnegan — but this one has the added attraction of jazzy ties to the immortal "Dean of American Jive," Cab Calloway. With its melodic sound, its similarity to Callahan, Caleb, Waylon, and Callum, and its fun, nature meaning, Calloway is a quietly rising choice in the US, given to 87 boys (and 22 girls) in a recent year.
  15. Baxter
    • Origin:

      English occupational name
    • Meaning:

      "baker"
    • Description:

      An x makes any name cooler, so that Baxter has a bit more pizzazz than the original Baker. Baxter had some currency as a first name a century ago--it was on the popularity lists sporadically from 1880 till the 1920s, peaking at Number 515 in 1886-- which means it's just about due for a comeback. And we can see Bax as a worthy follow-up to Max and Jax.
  16. Digby
    • Origin:

      English, Norse
    • Meaning:

      "town by the ditch"
    • Description:

      Digby is a place-name in Lincolnshire turned surname turned quirky first name that is starting to get some attention. In fact, it ranked in the UK Top 1000 in a recent year where it fits in with the likes of Barnaby, Rupert, and Wilbur.
  17. Arley
    • Origin:

      English
    • Meaning:

      "from the rabbit meadow; eagle's woodland; noble"
    • Description:

      Similar in sound to Harley, Marley, and Arlo, this surname-style name is familiar in Brazil and a Top 1000 choice in England and Wales. Pronounced as AHR-lee in English and ahr-LAY in Latin America, it may be a habitational name, relating to rabbits, hares, or eagles, depending on what Old English root you follow, though it may also relate to the names Arlette, Arleth, and Arlington, lending it the meaning "noble".
  18. Nikola
    • Origin:

      Serbian from the Greek Nikolaos
    • Meaning:

      "Victory of the people"
    • Description:

      Nikola is generally masculine in Serbia, Croatia, Bosnia, Montenegro, Bulgaria and Macedonia, while in Germany, Poland, Slovenia, Slovakia, Estonia and the Czech Republic it is usually feminine.
  19. Cabot
    • Origin:

      French
    • Meaning:

      "to sail"
    • Description:

      Cabot is an attractive English surname associated with the daring early Italian-born British explorer known as John Cabot; his birth name was Giovanni Caboto.
  20. Geordie
    • Origin:

      English demonym
    • Description:

      Though it looks, to the untrained American eye, like a yoonek spelling of Jordy, Geordie actually refers to people from Tyneside in Northeast England and the local dialect there. To give you a sense of what it implies to Brits, Geordie Shore is British MTV's long-running answer to Jersey Shore.

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