Pet Names So Ugly They're Cute

Gilda, although related to the words gold and gilded, has definitely tarnished. It once shimmered with the seductive image of Rita Hayworth in the film Gilda, then was associated with the beloved early Saturday Night Live star Gilda Radner. In opera, Gilda lives on as the name of the daughter of Rigoletto.

Gentle and easy going, but with an undertone of edginess, Lemmy could be a diminutive of the Hebrew Lemuel or borrowed from musician, songwriter, and founder of the band Motorhead, Lemmy (Ian Fraser) Kilmister. From the Hebrew, it means "for God", while from its pop cultural origins, it is supposedly derived from the phase "lemmy (lend me) a quid 'til Friday".

In the Bible, Beulah is a place, not a person, applied to the land of Israel by the prophet Isaiah. The land of Beulah has sometimes been considered a reference to heaven. Beulah began to be used as a given name in England at the time of the Reformation and was used by the seventeenth century Puritans.

Blanche, which originated as a nickname for a pale blonde and then became associated with the notion of purity, was in style a century ago, ranking in the double digits until 1920. She then had to fight the stereotype of faded Southern belle, a la Blanche DuBois in Tennessee Williams's A Streetcar Named Desire and Blanche Devereaux in TV's Golden Girls. Now all three of the Golden Girls--Blanche, Rose and Dorothy--could be ready for revival, with Blanche sounding like a stronger, simpler alternative to Bianca.

A Top 200 choice in the US from the late 1880s to the early 1930s, Irma has nevertheless fallen out of favor with modern parents, and doesn't look set for the sort of comeback that some of her vintage sisters have enjoyed in recent years. The devastating hurricane which hit the Caribbean Islands and the south-east coast of the US in 2017 has no doubt dealt its chances of revival a further blow.

Griselda is a famous folklore figure, noted for her patience and obedience. Her story has been told by Petrarch, Chaucer, Boccaccio and set to music by Scarlatti, Vivaldi and Massenet.

Velma likely originated as a phonetic spelling of the German name Wilma, itself derived from Wilhelmina. Velma Dinkley is a smart, if nerdy, character in Scooby Doo.

Only if you're an aviation buff or seriously addicted to popcorn.

Edwina may still be taking tea in the parlor, but we can see her joining friends like Matilda and Josephine for a comeback, especially if pronounced like Edwin rather than Edween.

Although it has a sweet meaning, this name feels dated nowadays, like a fifties poodle skirt. Lavender may be a fresher alternative.

Boris is one of the old Russian names being revived by chic Europeans; it hasn't quite made a comeback yet in the U.S., but it does have potential.

Hortense is actually the French feminine form of Hortensia, the name of a strong, politically active early Roman woman. Hortense began to be used in the English-speaking world in the nineteenth century. Napoleon had a stepdaughter named Hortense, it was the name of one of the main characters in the film Secrets and Lies and is also associated with novelist Hortense Calisher. As unappealing as it might be to most American parents, Hortense is now Number 155 in France (as of 2021).

Ebenezer is the name of a biblical place --the stone set up by Samuel to mark his victory over the Philistines--rather than a person. It was adopted by the British Puritans as a first name and then exported to America, where it had some early popularity, even entering the Top 1000 in the 1880s.

Its jaunty o-ending makes this name more appealing than most of its Germanic brothers, and we hope we're beyond the constant response to his name being "Where's Waldo?" The weighty reputation of writer and philosopher Ralph Waldo Emerson adds a measure of backbone to the name.

Has a decidedly middle-aged image.

Eunice is a New Testament name of the mother of Timothy, long associated with one of the Kennedy sisters, the founder of the Special Olympics. As high as Number 106 in the early 1900s, it lasted on the list until 1995. Eunice was the birth name of Nina Simone, which gives it a modicum of cool.

Ever since the enormous German cannon was dubbed by Allied soldiers "Big Bertha" in World War I, this name hasn't worked for a sweet little baby girl. But this was not always so. Hard as it might be to imagine now, Bertha was a Top 100 name until the 1930s, and in the 1880s was the seventh most popular name in the land--the equal of Joseph.

Associated all through the swing years with bandleader brothers Tommy and Jimmy Dorsey.

Guido was very popular in Renaissance Italy, with many namesakes including painter Fra Angelico (born Guido di Pietro) and mathematician Guido Fubini. Guy Fawkes, of gunpowder plot fame, sometimes used this version. Nowadays it's unfairly overlooked, but in the current trend for snappy international names ending in -o, this cultured gem deserves more use.

The connection to Freud is a strong one, but this German name has a strong and interesting sound and great nickname potential: Ziggy, Iggy, Sim, Sid...