Why TV Characters Have Boring Names
When the actor James Gandolfini died recently, TV watchers around the world mourned the simultaneous passing of one of the best-named characters of all time.
Sure, Tony Soprano was so much more than his name. The character was both rough and smooth. Affable and violent. Powerful and weak. But don’t all those qualities also describe that name?
It’s not every day you stumble upon a brilliantly named TV character. I’ll tell you why in one word: legal.
Yep. Every name—and I mean every name—belonging to a character on a television show is vetted by that network’s legal department. And many don’t pass muster. I learned this while producing my first TV pilot this past spring, a drama for CBS called “The Ordained.”
First let me explain that naming characters is almost as hard as naming your own children. You need something with a ring, a name that sounds a certain way rolling off an actor’s tongue. It might be a homonym to a word that describes the character.
Take Walter White in “Breaking Bad.” The name is bland and upstanding, just like the main character—that is, until he starts to cook meth. Or Don Draper in “Mad Men.” Notice the alliteration in both names? Doesn’t it add a bit of oomph?
Sometimes, TV writers slip in names of people they know. I’ll never forget a staffing interview in which I pointed out that the show’s creator used the name of a journalist I knew in person—and it turned out they were childhood friends. The creator mumbled that he’d have to change the name because it would “never get past legal now.” I didn’t get the job.
In my pilot, ethnicity played a large role in name selection. My script featured a large cast of multicultural characters, set as it was in New York City. One favorite was a young Chinese-American lawyer I named Grace Ping. How I loved that name. We cast the lovely actress Linda Park (“NCIS”) in the role. The crew never bothered to use her real name. She was Grace Ping from the get-go. And then we got a memo from legal. It turned out there was a real Grace Ping. One. So what, right?
Herein lay the problem: if the name belongs to one person and one person only, then that person has grounds to sue for defamation. If it belongs to many people, no problem.
In other words, common names are far likelier than unusual ones to pass that bar. And thus you have your Catherine Willows on “CSI,” your Jack Shephard on “Lost,” your Jack McCoy on “Law & Order,” your Patrick Jane on “The Mentalist.”
Though I was bummed to lose my Grace, I got to keep the most important character name of all: Tom Reilly, that of my hero. Played by Charlie Cox (“Boardwalk Empire”), he was an ex-priest who quits the priesthood when he hears a confession about a deadly plot against his political family. Tom Reilly was also the name of my father, a former priest who inspired my story. He died in 2009. Hearing his name bandied about during our shoot this spring felt a little like a resurrection.
In May, CBS announced its fall lineup for 2013, and my show wasn’t on it. Tom Reilly will never get a chance to join Tony Soprano in the public conscience. But it’s okay. Tom Reilly is also the name of my brother’s eldest son—my nephew and my father’s namesake. Tom Reilly lives on in real life, and that trumps television any day.
Lisa Takeuchi Cullen is the author of Pastors’ Wives, a new novel from Penguin/Plume, and The Ordained, a 2013 CBS drama pilot. Previously, she was a staff writer for Time magazine. Readers can like her author page on Facebook, follow her on Twitter @lisacullen, or visit her website at www.lisacullen.com.
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on June 28th, 2013 at 12:55 am
Thank you for writing this! As a writer who loves to come up with wild and wacky names for my characters, I have always, always wondered why TV characters get stuck with such boring ones–now I know.
In fact, according to my purely unscientific research, I have determined that the three most common names for female characters on TV are:
Think back to your favorite shows, and pay attention to the new shows this fall. I guarantee there will be more than one of each. Apparently, it’s not enough to be common, they also have to be one syllable!
on June 28th, 2013 at 8:50 am
I think the names in Friends are kind of creative.
Ross and Monica Geller
I don’t know anyone with those first names.
on June 28th, 2013 at 9:05 am
Hmm, I agree Friends names are quite creative. And I don’t find Jack boring, honestly.
on June 28th, 2013 at 9:29 am
Gilmore Girls has Lorelei, Rory as nn for Lorelei and Dean and Jess. A little different from the standard.
on June 28th, 2013 at 11:13 am
I’m really shocked that there is only ONE Grace Ping in the entire world! Would naming her Gracie have made the difference, or could that Grace have sued still?
on June 28th, 2013 at 2:28 pm
Scrubs has Elliot, Pretty Little Liars has Spencer (f), Aria, Wren (m), those are reasonably unusual (at least to me anyway).
on June 29th, 2013 at 9:25 pm
On the show Bones, the two main characters are named Temperance and Seeley. I think those are pretty original
on July 1st, 2013 at 5:52 pm
Walter White is pretty common, but a number of characters on Breaking Bad have one usual name paired with a more common name:
Gustavo Fring (this entire name is pretty unusual, actually)
on July 6th, 2013 at 3:33 pm
i love watching Parks and Recreation… and everyone on that show has a pretty common name…. so much so that I get characters confused. Like, wait who’s Ron, oh I thought that was Tom. 3 letter names, so common so confusing.
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