Humiliating names

The second most common numerical -illion name, after Million. Probably because of the outdated nickname Bill.

BloodRayne is a series of action-adventure video games, but the heroine's name is actually Rayne, a much more usable appellation for a non-vampire, non-animated child. We hope no-one uses this for their child.

Kids love Bob the Builder, but do they want to be Bob the Builder? Bob and Bobby have been out of style since the 1960s, but as vintage nickname-names -- Fred, Archie -- come back into vogue, Bob may tag along. Charlie Sheen used it for one of his twin sons.

Boo as a first name first achieved notoriety as the name of the child-man in Harper Lee's To Kill A Mockingbird. Arthur "Boo" Radley was meant to be frightening, but only in a simple, non-threatening way. More recently, Boo has been used as the middle name of one of chef Jamie Oliver's children and the nickname in the middle of television's Honey Boo Boo. Boo is also the name of the world's cutest dog and of the adorable little girl in Monsters Inc. In a more basic way, Boo is a term of endearment.

Boo may have started out as a nickname for the male character Arthur "Boo" Radley in To Kill A Mockingbird and these days may be closely associated with another male Boo, the "world's cutest dog" or with the adorable little girl in Monsters, Inc.

Brain is not a name, it's a misspelling of the long-popular Brian. What's really astonishing is not that it made the Top 1000 at all but that it hung on there for 25 years, from 1965 through 1989, Brian's heyday. All we can say is: sad.

Although this name literally means disaster, the use of Calamity as a descriptor of Martha Jane Cannery, aka Calamity Jane, was meant to signal that she was a good person to have in troubled times. Calamity Jane was well regarded as a frontierswoman and nurse, someone who was said to be extremely generous and compassionate to the sick and troubled.. Calamity's connection to the American West gives this a roguish name a sort of windswept charm about it. Indeed, the most controversial aspect of this name is its connection to the frontier wars that led to the dispossession of Native American peoples.

Attractive ancient name borne by several saints but sullied by association with yeast infection.

Not a great idea to associate your newborn with drug lords.

Not even for the child who wreaks havoc.

Antiseptic sounding.

Old and aristocratic European name that would be tough for an American kid to pull off.

A beautiful flower name deriving from the Latin word for dove. Sadly, in America this name is now forever linked with a tragic terrorist attack on a Colorado high school.

This Puritan virtue name may be unstylish, but it is also sympathetic and appealing in these largely uncomfortable times.

Cookie is most often used as a dog name, and it should stay that way.

Crash is a particularly calamitous entry in the badass boys' name category, taking Wilder and Maverick one -- or maybe a dozen -- steps further. But we can think of at least a dozen reasons you shouldn't name your baby Crash.