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The Craziest New Baby Names

crazy baby names

By Pamela Redmond Satran
There were 1393 new baby names coined by creatively-inclined parents in 2014 – and it’s safe to say that at least 1350 of them would have been better left as words, misspellings, celebrity surnames, or pure flights of fancy.

But no, these names were given for the very first time to at least five American babies, earning a place on the Social Security’s extended name popularity list.

The craziest of the crazy new names? Here are our picks for the Top 12, plus a handful of other new names that should never have been:

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We couldn’t resist this question on the forums: Which names do you wish you were brave enough to use?

Names you love….except nobody else does?

Names that are cool….but maybe a little too quirky?

Lovely literary names….with dark stories behind them?

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Oh no she didn’t!


Your mouth popped open.

Your jaw dropped.

You simply could not believe what your mother, your spouse, your college roommate, that stranger on the message board said about your baby’s name….or your own.

What’s the most outrageous, insulting, ignorant, ridiculous thing anyone has ever said to you about a name?

If you’ve been lucky enough not to be on the receiving end of a crazy name statement, what have you overheard someone else saying?

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baby egg

The just-released Social Security list includes over 1400 brand-new names, given for the very first time to five or more babies in the US.

As you might imagine, most of these names are pretty far out on the ledge.  There are lots of kree8tiv spellings of more conventional names: Finlea and Massyn, Londonn and Karsan.  There are names from around the world freshly introduced to America: Junhao and Mokshith and Motoki.  There are original combo names — Charlotterose and Marcusjames — and there are new word names and place-names and surname-names — Revelation and Tokyo and Thoreau — and there are even a couple of wonderful old names revived for the modern world: Hypatia and Thisbe, Romilly and Calisto.

But all these newborn names look downright sedate compared to a handful of choices it’s hard to believe were given to even one baby, much less five….or ten….or 63.

They’re the Most Outrageous New Baby Names of 2013.  Here are our picks for the wackiest of the newest, along with the number of babies who received each in the US last year:

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The Most Unusual Name You’ve Ever Heard


Forget Oranjello and Lemonjello: We’re not talking about bizarre baby name urban legends here. We don’t want to know that your sister-in-law’s cousin’s best friend works as a delivery room nurse and swears some clueless mom named her daughter Female.

Nor are we noting strange celebrity baby names, as it’s not just you alone who’s heard of starbabies Moxie, Apple, and Bronx Mowgli. Names from movies, books, and television don’t count either.

What we want to hear are the most unusual real-life names you’ve ever heard. As in: I shook this person’s hand. Lived next door to her. Maybe even gave birth to him and chose his incredibly unusual name myself.

Any details you can give us about the name’s origins and meaning would be appreciated because, you know, we can never get enough.

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