Category: baby name fights
Duana Taha reports that she and her new husband are compatible in every way, until they start talking about baby names.
I recently got married, and we’re very happy. Like a lot of just-married couples, we’re thinking about children in the near future, which is great.
Except we forgot one crucial thing. A baby name pre-nup.
Do most couples work out their baby names before they agree to be tied together forever? Was I unaware? Because there are some issues here we definitely should have discussed…!
It’s one of the biggest problems parents-to-be complain about on the Nameberry forums: family pressure over the choice of a name.
If not promoting their own or other relatives’ names, family members might just exercise what they see as their right to voice strong, uh, opinions about names. Ugh, you can’t name your son Felix: That’s a cat’s name!
Or was your family blessedly pressure-free on the topic of names? Or maybe you even tried to talk about names with them, and they weren’t interested?
Recently we asked the Nameberry facebookers (Have you joined yet? Better hurry on over there) to tell us which baby names they’d loved that their partners nixed.
The question prompted a flood of comments, with 65 (and counting) berries weighing in on which beloved names their partners banished from consideration, and why.
In our best fantasies, here’s how we name our babies:
DAD — Perfect. Now why don’t you let me rub your feet?
In reality, discussions go more like this:
DAD — Blech. I hate those kind of frilly names; if we have a girl, I think we should name her something cool, like Harley or Parker. And if we have a boy, my mother says we have to name him after my father.
MOM — Your mother’s not naming our baby. And your taste in names sucks.
Usually, after nine months or possibly ten, the parents manage to arrive at a name they both can live with. Why does baby-naming inspire such deep feelings and strong arguments in a couple who may have an easy time getting along in so many other ways?
Lying awake making name lists in the middle of the night.
Finding a name you love, only to have your neighbor use it for her dog.
Dealing with a partner who has no baby name ideas of his own, yet shoots down all of yours.
Writing one name on the birth certificate, only to change it a week later. And then change it back.
Have you been a victim of baby name craziness? Our message boards and comments are full of crazy, funny, and sometimes heart-breaking stories of baby name obsession, battles, indecision, procrastination, and yeah, sometimes all out insanity.
Has it happened to you? A little, a lot? Did you embrace the craziness or did it hit you unexpectedly, like a tsunami? Did you drive your partner — and maybe your family and friends — crazy about names, or were you the victim of others’ craziness?