Names No Boy May Be Cool Enough For

You have to be pretty damn cool to name your kid Elmer, cool in that I-like-it-and-I-don't-care-what-the-world-thinks kind of way. Except you're not the one who's going to have to deal with having the name Elmer when you play Little League. You're not the one who's going to have to introduce yourself as Elmer to girls at parties. In fact, if you think it's so cool, maybe you should change your own name to Elmer rather than laying it on a poor little kid. The point: While we can appreciate the contrarian cool inherent in these clunky names, we fear that few children at this point in time are cool enough actually to live with them.

• Archibald
• Arnold
• Bernard
• Bertram
• Burton
• Delbert
• Durwood
• Edgar
• Egbert
• Elmer
• Gomer

• Hansel
• Hubert
• Hyman
• Irving
• Maurice
• Melvin
• Mervyn
• Milton
• Montague
• Norbert
• Osbert

• Oswald
• Seymour
• Sheldon
• Sherman
• Sherwin
• Siegfried
• Stanley
• Uriah
• Wilbur
• Wilfred
• Willis

You might also like these lists:

Werewolf Names  Also contains: Irving

Colonial Names for Boys  Also contains: Archibald

Old Man Names  Also contains: Milton, Seymour, Stanley, Wilbur

Royal Names for Boys  Also contains: Edgar

Jane Austen Names   Also contains: Bertram

Names That Start With I  Also contains: Irving

Jane Austen Names for Boys   Also contains: Bertram

Old People Names  Also contains: Irving, Seymour

Vintage Names for Boys  Also contains: Archibald