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  1. #6
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    I completely understand everything you said, but I second (or third) everything that Pansy wrote as well. Wish you the best.

  2. #8
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Los Angeles
    Hi Pyrrhic -- I really admire how sensible and thoughtful you are; your daughter is lucky to have you as a mother.

    And it's great that Dillon wants to be involved as a parent to your child. But like Pansy and the others here, I think living together would just add a complication that could make everything harder rather than easier. If a year or two goes by with you working together as parents and getting to know each other better, you'll feel more sure about what you want to do then. But all these doubts and questions are not a good way to go into any living arrangement APART from the complication of your personal relationship.

    Maybe you can find a situation that will let you have your own spaces yet be close to one another -- two small apartments in the same building or shares in houses close to one another. You both deserve time to grow as individuals and explore your own lives and other relationships as well as to cooperate in raising your daughter. If over time you want to be together, then you can move in together without these kinds of doubts.

    Best of luck to you and thanks for being part of nameberry!
    Pam Satran

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