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  1. #11
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Posts
    989
    I think if someone is asking for opinions, or saying they're not sure about a name, such as 'we're thinking about naming him...' then opinions can be given. Obviously of you dont like a name you shouldn't just say it's horrendous and a terrible name, but giving valid points of why you, and perhaps many others, aren't a fan of a name can be helpful.
    If the baby is already born and named, or the parents are announcing a name *decision* before birth, then any criticism should be held. 'We are going to name him...' is not asking for your views, nor are any criticisms helpful. The parents have made their decision. Same goes for if they are asking on opinions for which middle name for a first name, negatives of the first name are not what is being asked for.
    Girls Names
    Mavis Sylvia Lyra Evadne Ilaria

    Girls Middles/Honours
    Juliet Margot Vera Celia Rosalie Eleanor


    Boys Names
    Elliot Griffin August Lysander Atticus

    Boys Middles/Honours
    Daniel Charles Jonas Piers Thomas


  2. #12
    Most of the time I'm of the opinion not your kid, not your business. I wouldn't say anything unless someone asked my honest opinion and even then I would try to be gentle. People have different tastes in names and there's nothing wrong with that.
    Tatum isn't my personal style but it's not offensive and I don't find it odd or a bad choice at all.
    You will never please everyone so the best advice you can give someone is to go with the name they love.
    Mommy to twins Arthur Robert and Jasper Steven 💞

    Thinking of: Phoebe Rosalind or Griffin Orlando

    *Murray*Fabian*Florian*Griffin*Lachlan*Harry*
    *Barnaby*Bellamy*Felix*Marius*Jonas*Frederick*
    *Cornelius*Basil*Kit*Valentine*Murphy*Victor*

    *Eliza*Kerensa*Celeste*Rosalind*Opal*Cleo*
    *Iris*Harriet*Helena*Delphine*Sylvie*
    *Wilhelmina*Ivy*Hero*Phoebe*
    *Clara*Vivian*Winifred*Victoria*Blythe*

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Apr 2015
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    2,134
    I think it's completely inappropriate to shame someone about their choice of name. One could perhaps quietly discuss the name with the parents if there's a genuine reason for concern, but I think there are very few names that are genuinely inappropriate to use. 99.8% of the time, it is no ones business to comment on anyone's choice of name. Not your baby. Not your business.
    Now posting as @thelittlefairywren!
    ...felt the need for a fresh user...



  4. #14
    I think there is also a way to voice a concern without sounding judgemental. If I'm close with a couple who are sharing their name choice with me, and it's any kind of Lucifer/Adolph name, I would say something supporting first, or something like "How unique, Are you concerned about the connotations of the name or the connection to___?" But I still would never say, you should not use that name or shame them for it.

    And this is even if I am close with the parents. I don't think anybody should be making negative comments at all.

    When we are pregnant, I will not be sharing gender or prospective name choices with anyone until birth
    married, just dreaming for now
    hoping to conceive 2020 or early 2021

    GIRLS
    Auden Rena
    Clarke Aveline
    Tatum Cadence
    Delta Wren
    Margot Rhiannon
    Imogen Story

    BOYS
    Rory Hart
    Callum Avery
    Lowell Hayes
    Leland Ames
    Arlo Kit

  5. #15
    I wouldn’t call it “shaming” in this case, but I see a fair amount of negativity on Nameberry in the forums.
    When somebody asks about everyone’s opinions of a name they are considering for their child, this is what I pretty much break it down to.

    Appropriate responses if you don’t like the name:
    “It isn’t my style”
    “It might often be mispronounced or misspelled“
    “It might have this bad association”
    “It is a tongue-twister for me to say.”

    Inappropriate responses:
    “Ugly”, “clunky”, “try-hard”, “yoo-neek”, “plain” or anything else that is simply unhelpful!

    In the real world, just keep your opinions to yourself if you don’t like the name! You do nothing but make someone feel bad.
    Rosa ~ Haven ~ Irie ~ Frances ~ Eve ~ Primrose ~ Olivine ~ Georgia ~ Lucille ~ Mirabelle ~ Valley ~ Carolina ~ Prynne ~ Freya ~ Maisie ~ Calypso ~ Odessa ~ Katalina ~ Esperanza ~ Louise

    Ambrose ~ Octavio ~ Cristiano ~ Idris ~ Vicente ~ Roman ~ Abel ~ Imre ~ Francisco ~ Ichigo ~ Thorin ~ Cedric ~ Valerian ~ Silas ~ Callum ~ Alarlc ~ Felix ~ Alejandro ~ Salem ~ Theo

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Nov 2018
    Posts
    248
    All any name needs is to be
    1. Spellable
    2, Pronouncable.
    If you love and name and I don't best thing is not to comment.

  7. #17
    Join Date
    Aug 2019
    Posts
    516
    Yeah that does suck. It's a obvious that someone has bad intentions when they do that because shaming your name choice is only going to upset you and make you feel self-conscious about it. It's plain mean.

    I haven't looked at the other responses but I'm willing to bet that at least one person has said "everyone is entitled to an opinion" (actually no one said this! *note to self: this isn't youtube lol) but the difference here is that that opinion is going to hurt someone else, so it's best to just keep it to yourself. As the saying goes, 'if you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all'.

    People always judge when you live your life outside of the mainstream because everyone feels pressured to stay in the mainstream and no one wants to. So when you have the courage to step outside of it, someone else is always going to try to beat you down about it because they're too scared to try it themselves.

    It's not written in stone though, people can change and I think there is some progress here, mainly with younger generations.
    Last edited by ferix08; December 12th, 2019 at 07:31 AM.

  8. #18
    Join Date
    Jul 2017
    Posts
    2,570
    Awful! I don't like this at all. First of all, Tatum is not a weird name to me, I love it! I gave my child a very unusual name and have gotten some strong opinions about it. In fact, we didn't tell people our name choice beforehand because we didn't want to hear opinions. Does no one have manners anymore? Its one thing to express your opinion on a forum like this where people are asking for it, but giving your opinion or expressing your dislike for a person's name choice, or anything really, is very rude and inappropriate. When it comes to parenthood, too many people are critical these days. Unless its truly dangerous, there's no need to say anything. Keep your bad opinions to yourself! Parenthood is hard enough without people ripping each other apart over stupid stuff.

  9. #19
    Join Date
    Apr 2018
    Location
    United States
    Posts
    70
    Society has successfully programmed me to never verbalize an opposing opinion. I would just fake smile and cringe inwardly, but nothing more.
    Abraham Clifton Bing ~ Artis Boyd ~ Alvin Jedidiah Fenton ~
    Grover Bradley Hill ~ Kermit Adler Gates ~ Mordecai Laszlo Perkins ~
    Mortimer Otis River


    Cleo Caroline Grace ~ Ellen Heidi Blaise ~ Ginger Madison Alice ~ Iris Eluned Stacey

  10. #20
    Join Date
    Oct 2014
    Location
    PNW (US)
    Posts
    2,737
    I would never insult someone else's name choice or even question it. It's not my business and honestly I'm just happy when people share their name taste with me! My SO and I might talk about it later and be like "eh, I don't really like that" but that's it.

    I've been surprised that feedback to my daughter's name has been so kind! And I'm thankful people have kept any judgment to themselves haha
    Mama to Beatrix

    Current favorite:
    Winifred Daisy Dot


    Dorothy Belle ۰ Mabel Violet ۰ Frances Eloise
    Winifred Daisy ۰ Rosemary Alice ۰ Louisa May
    Josephine West ۰ Prudence Marigold ۰ Harriet Ruby ۰ Pippa Lavender


    Archie Theodore ۰ Linus Arthur ۰ Casper Milo
    Ernest George ۰ Harry Oscar ۰ Fritz Albert
    August Rowan ۰ Rex Barnaby ۰ Reuben Leo ۰ Alfie Rupert

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