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  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2011

    Husband and wife stalemate

    I'm having issues agreeing with my husband on a boy name. (What else is new?)
    We have two daughters . Hazel Zofia and Avvalyn May
    I love classic boy names . Henry is my absolute favorite among Lincoln, Graham, Oliver, and more. I gave him a long list to which he stuck his nose up and said he thinks they all sound "basic." He likes a little creativity I guess.
    The only name he seems to like thus far is Desmond.
    Which honestly I used to find very attractive, but I just cannot seem to accept that for our little baby boy. To me it sounds a little pretentious and I'm not too fond of D names in general.
    He also mentioned Grey. But truly I have a hard time with this as a first name because no middle name sounds good with it. Help! =)
    How do you agree on a name?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2016
    Greyson perhaps - it feels surnamey like Lincoln and Desmond, shares sounds with Graham and could be paired more easily with middle names?

    Some other ideas:
    Sarai Matilda|Mabli Charlotte|Una Adele|Cherith Eliza
    Sloane Felicity|Flora Penelope|Juno Delilah|Lois Aurelia
    Sholto Felix|Tristan Rafferty|Percy Evander|Bram Atticus
    Otto Elias|Linus Theodore|Jude Amadeus|Jesse Peregrine

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    If he likes Grey, Graham nn Grey/Gray sounds like a good option to me. Theres also Grayson, but that doesnt fit your style. Graham is easier to fit a nice middle name to than Grey
    Girls Names
    Liliana Juliet Sylvia Marcella Rosalie Evadne

    Girls Middles/Honours
    Juliet Margot Vera Celia Rosalie Eleanor

    Boys Names
    Griffin Elliot 'Otto' Caspian Jonas Elias Chester

    Boys Middles/Honours
    Daniel Charles Bennett Piers Thomas

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Oct 2017
    My husband and I had lots of girl names we loved but found boy names very difficult. I think it’s pretty common.

    I personally kept a running list during my pregnancies and asked my husband every month or so what he was thinking. I found that some he had vetoed earlier he changed his mind on and ended up liking later, which surprised me.

    There are lots of options for “fresh” versions of classic names which is great for your situation. One option is to find a nickname one of you like (e.g. Grey) and then choose a longer name which allows for that nickname. The suggestion of Greyson is a good one!
    Mom to Cedar 杉 and Evren 宇宙

  5. #5
    I noticed this, too. My husband's taste often changed, and he eventually ended up agreeing to put one in our top three that he originally disliked (and that name became our son's name).

  6. #6
    A few thoughts:

    1) If you gave him a long list of names to consider, it's not fair for him to veto ALL the names. I get that he likes more creative names and you like more classic names. Maybe he's not going to go for Henry and Oliver, but names like Lincoln and Graham certainly aren't "basic." (In fact, stylistically, they seem very close to Desmond.) Show him your list again, and tell him he needs to pick the 3-5 that he likes most.

    2) If he's going to complain about the names you're choosing, he needs to suggest more than two alternatives. Ask him to make a longer list of names he likes -- maybe aiming for 10-15 suggestions. He can use a baby name book, a tool like Nymbler or the Name Generator on this site, or maybe the sibling name suggestions from Baby Name Wizard. Then you need to look through his list and pick your top 3-5 out of his choices.

    3) Keep Desmond on the list. You used to really like it, so unless you're due tomorrow, there's a change you might come around to it again. It's stylistically very similar to your list, and it pairs well with your daughters' names. I know a little boy named Desmond, and it's very wearable. It doesn't seem pretentious at all.

    Good luck!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Play this game
    Tell him to pick the two boys names he likes best for each letter of the alphabet minus any you wouldn't consider
    At set times of day trade paper or text each other ... Write each others lists on paper as you go, crossing out ones you veto and circle any you may like. See if anything pops up.
    Psalm 127:3-5

  8. #8
    Join Date
    May 2014
    It might be helpful for you to each write a top 10 names separately and then compare the two to see if any names overlap. Even if there isn't overlap, you might each find names that you like and haven't thought of before or be able to find a common style.

    I actually really like both the names Desmond and Grey. Desmond has such a unique sound yet is easy to pronounce and spell. I think Grey would sound best with a multiple syllable middle name, such as Gray Oliver, Gray Alexander, or Gray Elliott. However, if you really aren't loving either then you could take them off your list.

    Henry, Lincoln, Oliver, and Graham are all awesome names but if your husband isn't feeling them then it might be best to drop them and find something in a similar style.

    You might like:

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Dec 2017
    Would the nickname Desi soften Desmond for you? Like Desi Arnaz!
    Love my Thalia

    Irene, Helena, Rhea, Sylvia, Phoebe, Linnea, Simone, Mariel
    Nathaniel, Alden, Amias, Wilder, Jasper, Simon, Clement, Solomon

    Guilty Pleasures
    Ione, Kassiani, Acacia, Leander, Griffin, Cosmas

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Dec 2014
    Pennsylvania, USA
    I do like Desmond. You can call him Des. I'd also suggest Ramsey.
    Cat Foster Mom
    no tiny humans, but love names


    Hazel, Ivy, Thea, Felicity, Lorelei, Jade, Mariah, Quinn, Raven, Cassidy

    Dallas, Ramsey, Everett, Felix, Jasper, Miles, Oliver, Lincoln, Toby, Joel, Wesley

    Vote on my name list - click here

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