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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2019
    Posts
    2

    Need Help Changing My Name!!

    Hello fellow name lovers,

    I have always loved my name and names in general, but I am getting married and am at a complete loss of what to change my name to, or whether to keep it the same. I need some help!

    My name currently is Rachel Carmine Howard. Carmine was my Great Grandmother's name and we were very close, so that name has special meaning for me. My dad was adopted and is not super close with his family so I don't have a very strong connection with the last name "Howard," but I am close with my dad and I feel like my last name ties me to him. My fiance's last name is Brailsford.

    Here are all the options and thoughts I have about them:
    -Rachel Carmine Howard (The same name I know and love, but would feel a lack of creating a new family unit)
    -Rachel Brailsford (Flows well, short and sweet.)
    -Rachel Carmine Brailsford (Not sure how I feel about this combo.)
    -Rachel Howard Brailsford (My least favorite, the ard/ord endings feel like a mouthful)

    Any other ideas or suggestions would be much appreciated!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2019
    Location
    Midwest USA
    Posts
    197
    Congratulations on your impending nuptials! Though I'm not yet married, I'm a traditionalist and intend on taking my fiance's last name so for me the answer was obvious: Rachel Carmine Brailsford. I understand changing your last name must be weird to adjust to but you're joining your life with someone and I just believe it's a nice way to respect and honor that. I think you should keep Carmine since it's more meaningful to you. Does your fiancé feel one way or the other? It's also perfectly common and acceptable nowadays to just keep your same name (so that's my second pick), I just prefer taking the new name. Good luck!!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Posts
    980
    If you want the same name for a family unit, I wouldnt keep your old name. Being a cohesive family is the reason we change our names during marriage.
    I personally wouldn't drop the middle name. Your full name, muddle included, is very rarely used, so the length or flow of it isn't really a big deal.
    If you're not sure about taking your partners last ne, as you like how your surname links you to your father, have you spoken to your partner about both taking double barrelled surnames? I realise Brailsford-Howard is not ideal, but you could use something like Brailsford-Howe or Howard-Brail.
    Girls Names
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  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2019
    Location
    Midwest USA
    Posts
    197
    Hello again, I responded late last night and perhaps misunderstood part of your post, so for that I apologize. If Carmine is your middle name then I think Rachel Howard-Brailsford sounds perfectly fine!! Middle names are rarely said aloud and are only included on official documents so I really wouldn't worry about the "flow". At first I thought Carmine was part of your last name. I do know someone with three last names though.... they're all long and it's a lot but it's not the end of the world if it's what makes them (or you) the happiest at the end of the day!

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2019
    Location
    East Coast
    Posts
    294
    Have you considered using Howard as a second middle name instead? Rachel Carmine Howard Brailsford. Or perhaps Rachel Carmine Howie Brailsford? Howie sounds a bit more feminine and gets rid of the awkward ard and ord sounds following each other. Or even taking on a feminine form of your father’s first or middle names as your middle if it’s just about keeping a connection to your father and not so much a connection to Howard? It’s clearly very important to you that you keep Carmine, so I think a second middle is a good route! Especially since middles aren’t used very often, and having two middles is pretty common. This way you keep a connection to your father as well as take on your husband’s last name, so you’ll be a cohesive family.
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