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  1. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2013
    Xi'An, China
    Quote Originally Posted by seedsandstones View Post
    It is so difficult to go through this, and all the harder because people so often diminish anxiety/depression and put pressure on mothers of new babies to be happy all the time and bounce back to themselves and all that baloney.

    I have had anxiety and depression for half my life, have sought help in the past, know pretty well what makes those conditions worse for me, and knew the signs of PPA/PPD before giving birth to my son last year. I still got it, and bad. I'm coming out of it now, I think, but want to add my voice in here and am feeling galvanized to get some help to speed my recovery (and hopefully avoid a second bout after my second kid).

    Thanks for bringing this up. You're brave and kindhearted to do it. I hope you continue to get the sleep you need and have the support you need to weather this transition. Congratulations on your new babe, too. Taking care of ourselves is exactly what we need and we don't need to feel guilt/shame for focusing our efforts there (and it really does enable us to be better parents, too).
    Were you able to see a doctor and get meds? I'm pretty sure that I also had this with my first, but didn't get insomnia and wrote it down to bad circumstances. That time it took over a year before I felt good... The doctor essentially told me this time that the earlier you catch it and treat it, the better the prognosis is... and the sooner you'll be "back to normal". That being said, I'm not a fan of the side effects of my meds... an upset stomach, inability to get a deep sleep, etc.

    Name Nerd, Professor, Anthropologist, INTP, Expat, Mom


    Emiliana Pari 郑煜曈 '14
    Caspian Kaveh 郑煜祺 '17


  2. #8
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    I don't have children, but I do have severe OCD and social anxiety as well as generalized anxiety and depression. These are issues I've dealt with since I was a child, and the effects have been crippling for me both socially and emotionally. I'm not able to form lasting relationships with anyone outside of my family, for example. Medication doesn't work for me. The side effects I've experienced were too severe. Instead, my treatment consists of cognitive behavioral therapy and self-care (regular exercise and fresh air, diet modifications, etc), and I've had to learn to recognize patterns in my behavior that lead to a worsening of my symptoms. I'm on a vitamin regimen recommended by my doctor that helps a lot as well. It can be a lot to keep track of, but I think the most important part of dealing with this sort of mental illness is learning how to make you feel better. You aren't alone in this. Best of luck as you learn what helps you!

  3. #10
    Join Date
    Sep 2013
    South Wales, UK
    Hi @tfzolghadr. I suffer from OCD, and have done most of my life.

    Its absolutely horrific and unfortunately there isn't any treatment. I've had cognitive behavioural therapy which for me wasn't great (not a properly qualified 'therapist') and I'm on medication for anxiety and depression, but there is other medication I have been on in the past which I couldn't carry on taking as I was so tired I physically couldn't go to work.
    I haven't got children, and nor am I pregnant, so my experiences may be different to yours. But the best way to control OCD or OCD-like symptoms is to just look after yourself! Drink lots of water, cut down on sugar, take walks or go for runs. It really makes me feel better in myself and in turn my OCD isn't as bad as it could be otherwise.

    Please feel free to message me if you have any questions
    Little Miss's
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  4. #12
    Join Date
    Sep 2017
    London in body but Paris in heart and soul
    I have been hesitant to join this thread but I thought I might as well. I was diagnosed with bi-polar when I was 22.

    I had moved from France to London for university and became depressed but I thought it was just home sickness, my eating disorder got worse and then the severe mood swings started. I had real up moments where I was hyper and didn’t sleep, I would miss loads of lectures and then one night I went missing all night because I was wandering around London taking photos of architectural masterpieces, my flatmate was really worried and trying to ring me but I had thrown my phone away because I thought it was evil. I got quite delusional and thoughts secret messages were being sent to me through the TV, media and books. I also got really bad depressive episodes when I was so down and couldn’t leave my bed and would sleep a lot but not eat. I was dragged by my flatmate to the doctors who said I was depressed and gave me some antidepressants. After graduation though I ended up on a psych ward due to a suicide attempt, I was there for 5 days and was told I had bi-polar.

    I started some meds, there was some trial and error but we found the right balance of meds after a few months. I was also diagnosed with OCD and bulimia. I also started seeing a psychologist and the mixture of meds and psychology really helped. I soon got back on track and went and got my masters, met my wonderful and supportive husband and had my son but I do keep a very close eye on things and have a great relationship with my psychiatrist, psychologist and mental health team. We were very careful when trying to get pregnant and I was closely monitored. I did end up with some PPD but that was to be expected but I didn’t relapse in pregnancy which was a great relief. I also did get really depressed after all of our miscarriages and felt rather hopeless when we were struggling with fertility. My psychiatrist is keeping an even closer eye on me than in my previous pregnancy without Rufus and my short lived ones because apparently you are more likely to develop depression etc in twin pregnancies than single ones and with my history of mental illness it’s even more likely.

    My PPD lasted until Rufus was about 6 months but the second to the fourth month were the worst. I was really anxious and didn’t want people to touch Rufus and was overly protective of him. I then got insomnia because I was worrying so much about Rufus and was constantly checking that he was breathing and was reading all these websites about SIDS and infan mortality, I was constantly contacting Rufus’ paediatrician to ask questions and asking him to check him over constantly. I was obsessively checking his temperature, measuring all his food and milk and cleaning his bottles and cutlery etc about 5 times, constantly cleaning. You get the drill?

    I don’t often like talking about my mental health issues because many people treat me differently or go “You?! Mental health issues? But look at you! You have an amazing husband, a beautiful son, a great job that you love and a wonderful house! What more could you want?!”. I have a very small circle of really, really close friends who know but they are the only ones outside of my family. It is hard to live with an illness that other people can’t see because they think you are fine but in reality you are falling to pieces inside.

    I think one of the best things you can do is find a psychiatrist, OB, GP or any medical/health professional who gets you. I adore all of my doctors and midwives but I am lucky enough that I can go private (instead of NHS) so I can very carefully pick and research them before choosing them, it’s not always the case. BUT if you don’t like your doctor etc then ask for a new one, don’t think you are being annoying or that you will hurt their feelings because it’s not their feelings that matter in this, they are professionals and can deal with it.

    Sorry for rambling.
    Last edited by poodle; October 31st, 2017 at 06:29 PM. Reason: I edited a bit for privacy.
    lois + benjy =
    rufus alexander whitby • born august 2015
    identical twin girls names under reconstruction • due april 2018

    gideon • diccon • emmett • cyrus • hugo • linus • august • ezekiel • jago • sebastian • felix • byron • asher • marcus • xavier • arthur • timothy • leopold
    ~ • ~
    leda • pandora • ottilie • daphne • evangeline • opal • willa • genevieve • blythe • claudia • margot • marceline • jessamine • magnolia • aveline • romilly • tabitha • aurora

  5. #14
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    I was diagnosed with PPD after my most recent miscarriage. I had no idea you could be diagnosed with PPD without actually giving birth. But like my therapist explained to me, all of the hormones were there and I experienced a major life change. I was having panic attacks for the first time in my life, I actually didn't know what they were at first. It was terrifying.

    I actually didn't like my therapist at all. I do think simply talking about my feelings was what helped the most. I had been keeping everything to myself and letting my feelings bottle up. I didn't think anyone wanted to hear about how sad I was or how angry I was. It turns out a lot of my friends were more than willing to listen, they just didn't know how to start a conversation. So for me, the best therapy was talking with my friends and family openly about everything. It was really hard at first since I'm normally a private person. But after a while, I realized it felt really good to tell my story.

    I'm glad your husband is supportive, that's so important. Along with a doctor you trust of course. Best of luck to you!
    My entire world <3
    Indie Lola & Rowan Violet

    Henna . Liv ... Asher . Luca

    I carry your heart with me. I carry it in my heart.
    <3 [7.1.15] & [4.18.17] <3

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