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Thread: Young Moms
July 5th, 2013 01:39 PM #36
Last edited by milasmama; July 5th, 2013 at 01:41 PM.Two small people, Mila Arden and Cato Bennett.
If I had a baby tomorrow...
Atlas Adair or Lyra Sylvie
July 5th, 2013 01:54 PM #38Senior Member
- Join Date
- Oct 2009
Again, I really am not trying to aruge! Just saying that from my perspective, that is how I took it, as a generalisation! No one can meet ALL teen moms in the world. So saying that all the ones she met fall under a certain stereotype IS in fact a generalisation of teen mothers. Anyways, I don't like to make such a big thing over someone's wording. Maybe she meant it that way and maybe she didnt. The fact of the matter is that most people stereotype and generalize about those who fall under categories that can be taboo. (This statement in itsel is a generalization because some people dont do this at all!) Such a teen parents.And teen parents living at home or off of welfare IS looked down upon by society, no matter which way you look at it. Again, speaking in a generalized manner. See? Generalizations are used often. They are not all wrong. All I'm sayin is that there are people who don't fit under them and can get offended by a generalization. Just as you got offended when I said people look down on those livig at their parents or off of welfare. Because you don't fall under that category, and you feel the need to defend that. I was in the same situation. I know I am arguing at this point, and it really is such a silly thing to be arguing over lol!
July 5th, 2013 03:52 PM #40Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jul 2012
- London, England
The reasons I (sometimes) judge young mums is not because they choose to have children young. If you want to do all that at 20, fine by me. It's your life and your choices, and I'm not going to stop you. I was raised by a young mum and I turned out pretty good. But in general I think people make better parents when they're "older" (25-40) as they've got more experience, they're actually grown up and they think more (on good and bad). You can't know this until you're older, but there's an ocean of things you don't know yet when you're in your late teens/early 20's, and of course that reflects what kind of parent you'll be. I'm astonished at people who find a partner and marry at such a young age. And adding a child to that, I would not dare. But that's the experience and knowledge age provides.
Reasons why what young mums refer to as old mums judge them, I think, are two things. The first one is that young mums seem to think everyone over 30 are ancient and that we can't keep up with toddlers. Most people in their 30's I know are in far better shape than most 20 year old's I see. It's also annoying when young mums seems to think it's necessarily a selfish choice "older" mum makes.Not everyone meets the person they want to be with at 18. And if they do, it's likely it will break. Secondly and most importantly: whenever I see a misbehaved, rude, unattended to, snotty, dirty little child, there's a young mum attached to it. They talk on their phones and listen to their iPods while strolling their toddler or pushing them on the swings. they smoke while pregnant, they smoke with their child in their arms, they seem more interested in their chavvy girlfriends than their own child who's crying and throwing tantrums because mummy doesn't pay them any attention. I never see "older" mums behaving this way. There's a nonchalant, I couldn't care less about this little person I made behaviour I find repulsive. I'm not saying this applies to any of the young mums here (I know some of you are wonderful!), but it certainly does to the ones I see out and about where I live.My darling Marian Illyria Aphrodite, March 2013 & Little Bunny (a girl!) due 9th of February 2014
July 5th, 2013 04:19 PM #42Senior Member
- Join Date
- Oct 2009
I won't bother arguing my point any further. Young mom or old mom, it doesn't matter, so long as you love your little one with your whole heart and care for their needs. I've seen plenty of young moms fail at this, and plenty of old moms fail as well.
July 5th, 2013 08:31 PM #44Senior Member
Baby girl K.A.
- Join Date
- Sep 2012
Born September 2013
Guilty pleasures: Anastasia Isadora/Isidore Nicodemus Persephone Darrow Opaline Aurelia Chloe Mirabel Camelia Theodore Eugenia