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Thread: The LAST Name

  1. #96
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Quote Originally Posted by yellow View Post
    For YOU there are more serious considerations. For me, there weren't. Some people place a high level of importance on this stuff, some don't. There's no justification for you to get "so annoyed" at someone else's reasoning for this relatively insignificant life choice, especially when it has no effect on you whatesoever. If prettiness of name is the last remaining consideration when all other variables are a wash (as was my situation), prettiness of name WILL be the deciding factor.

    I attached no sense of self-identity to my surname - WASH
    People question your choice equally either way where I live - WASH
    Having the same name as the kids vs. retaining same name as 'original' family - WASH
    No professional issues to take into consideration - WASH
    Husband was open to and supportive of my choice - WASH
    Neither my parents nor my in-laws expressed opinions or concerns - WASH
    My maiden name is boring and common, his is super-rare and interesting (even though I don't actually love it that much)
    ==== Changing wins

    I didn't need some big earth-shattering justification for changing my name. It was my choice. I can make my choices for the biggest or smallest of reasons, it simply doesn't matter.

    In the end, why on earth do you care? I think you're projecting a lot of your OWN concerns and indecisiveness onto others. Getting annoyed at others for their own decision-making process is not much different from judging the final decision itself. This is part of the problem, part of why women are so stressed about this decision in the first place and worrying about what "society" expects of them instead of just making the choice that feels right for THEM.

    I share my thought process when people are genuinely interested to hear about it, but attitudes like this are precisely why I don't put much stock in others' opinions about and reactions to name change choices. There will always be someone who takes issue with the decision, and if not the choice itself then the reasoning behind it. I changed mine. BFD. My friend didn't. BBBBFFFFFDDDDD. It effects NO ONE.
    Geez, sorry for offering an opinion on a thread that asked for people's opinions. By the way, I didn't see this comment until now obviously.
    ~ Violet Elizabeth Rose ~


  2. #98
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    I changed my last name to my husband's name. I wasn't super attached to my own and I wanted us to have the same name/future kids to have the same name.

    What's interesting is that my husband's name very obviously and clearly comes from a specific culture/country. It's quite a common name from this country. When combined with my first name, it's sounds like I'm completely from this group as well. My first name is quite universal but used often in the country of my husband's last name. This is fine by me, but it's a little weird that people assume I'm from that nationality upon hearing my name. Also, I was born in an Eastern European country and speak that language, but you would NEVER be able to tell from my name. I feel like my original/familial cultural identity is hidden by my name.
    Expecting boy #2 this summer

  3. #100
    My fiance are planning on changing both of our names to a unified surname.Reason why is because neither of us like our current surnames and have any other family besides each other.But #1 reason for me is that he was married now divorced and she took his name.So for a bit there was a so i don't want a surname that has been mutually shared that way.
    His two daughters on the other hand have their bio mom's madien names.So this surname will be for us and future children sadly I can't steal his daughter(i've only had the chance of meeting one daughter) and change her name to our new family surname...

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