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March 11th, 2012 02:01 PM #6Member
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- Sep 2011
March 11th, 2012 04:37 PM #8Senior Member
- Join Date
- May 2011
I've had 2 natural births and I'd be happy to answer any questions you might have I think a lot of those books can be very unrealistic and the advice they give can be difficult to apply to real life situations.
I think asking women who've personally gone through it is better, but of course, its your own decision.
In my own experience, the first four weeks were a haze of pain (from a very minor vaginal tear, it didn't even need stitches), feeding the baby and changing diapers. It also may take a few weeks to truly bond with your baby, don't be shocked if you don't bond instantly with him or her. That initial rush of love doesn't happen for everyone, for some women, bonding for a few weeks is necessary.
Personally, apart from the first four weeks of getting to know baby, I found months 6-9 the hardest to deal with. By that age they're old enough to throw their weight around and have tantrums, which can be hard to deal with! They also want to be entertained all the time, I remember missing the newborn days when the were content to either sit in my arms or their crib instead of demanding attention all the time!
Hope that helpedProud Mama to Two Perfect Little Ladies.
Big Girl, 25.04.2007
Small Girl, 06.09.2011
Wanting to be Pregnant & Hoping for a 2013 Blessing.
Alice Victoria Primrose | Annabella Sophie Faye
Noah Gabriel Joseph | Zachary Roman James
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March 11th, 2012 07:12 PM #10Senior Member
- Join Date
- Dec 2011
So I just found out I am expecting as well, and I did find this blog which had this article about what people never tell you. While it is rather scary, it's written tongue-in-cheek which I find makes it a little easier to digest. Also, read the pages of comments after. I find it at least a little comforting that so many women have gone through this before and you and I will survive it too!
best of luck!
March 12th, 2012 12:07 AM #12
Thank you girls so very much!!!
I know if all these things had happened unexpectedly, I'd probably be terrified!
And Lucy Kate, I do have some questions off the top of my head!!!
Firstly, how bad does your bottom tend to hurt after birth? I know everyone is different, and different situations happen in different labors. But does a slight tear make a HUGE difference in pain? [assuming you only tore in one birth? Or did you in both?]. Was it just uncomfortable pains? Or was it the type you stick on pain meds for because otherwise it wouldn't be bearable? <3
Also, how common are tears? Does this happen to a lot of woman? And not to be tmi, but is there a general reason that tears occur? <3 I hope that doesn't sound wrong!!! But is it preventable? Or does it just happen to some woman? <3
For how long do you remain looking very pregnant? Such as the poster above saying you still look 9 months pregnant after birth... does it start shrinking a bit to not look to pregnant and to the "not-back-to-my-old-self-yet" likeness within like days, weeks, or months? <3
I have read that engorgement, improper latching, etc can all be really painful to you. But as Q1 was like, is it just really uncomfortable? Or is it really bad pain? <3
Does your bodies metabolism completely change after giving birth? Like, I am the type who's got a very high metabolism, and I've never been overweight before. I just lose weight quick! I have done light exercising, like Yoga, before. And I plan to continue a pregnancy yoga soon enough. And after I give birth, and once I feel up to it, I'd like to do a Mommy and Baby sort of yoga class! I don't expect to bounce right back into shape too soon, but in continuing regular exercise and all, would your body still burn fat away in the same way? Or does it all change? I am still very young. Well, not too young But a college age girl. And my metabolism hasn't slowed yet...
Well, this is everything on my mind now!!! But if anything comes to your mind that you think I should know, I'd really love to hear it!! I really appreciate you being willing to answer these questions for me!!!
Also, thank you so much Ange84! I will go read the article now!!! But the idea of so many others going through this before really is comforting<3 And apparently its not bad enough to prevent a second time around <3 Thank you!!
March 12th, 2012 12:33 AM #14
I think my best advice is to work out a Support network before you have the baby.
Personal Support: eg family/close friends who can make you some meals, help you with some cleaning and generally watch bub while you sleep a bit or drop off some shopping (maybe even BEFORE baby arrives!)
Medical support people: a great GP, Obstetrician who you see regularly, find a lactation consultant, local baby/materity care nurses
Community support: parenting groups for people with new babies, prenatal classes- eg yoga, birthing, breastfeeding.
The physical aspect of post baby can vary alot depending on your pregnancy, your own ability to heal and your baby.
For example: a healthy woman who has a full term natural birth with few drugs and good milk supply with a baby who attaches well will have a very different experience from say a woman who encounter pregnancy complications, emergency c-section with a tiny premature baby.
Enjoy your pregnancy, celebrate the changes and best of luck to you and your new addition.
emiliajPhoebe Eliza Grace arrived after 2 Years of IVF