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  1. #36
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Posts
    434
    One thought though that no one has said. Yes, there were no drugs in the olden days, however, a lot of women died from childbirth, and influenza. I'm not trying to scare anyone; I just agree with those who say that it's our body and we know what we can handle and EVERY pregnancy is different. That being said, my mother had 4 natural births, in a hospital, all very painful, but did not have any health problems until the the fourth was born, and they told her it would be life - threatening to have any more kids. 3 years later, she was pregnant with my baby sister, and was fine. However, this time she opted for an epidural and loved the experience and recommended it to me. I get my pain tolerance from my dad. I take ibuprofen every month for my horrible back cramps and was sedated for my wisdom teeth surgery. That's how I am, so an epidural sounds great, especially if my labors are similar to my moms. Yikes. My conflict is this and though it sounds silly, I heard that the more pain you go through the more you will love your baby because of the sacrifice you made, and I was very disturbed by that! If I get epidurals, will I love my children less than my mom loved me? Would it be selfish to do that? I totally understand those who, like my mom, need it but what if I just want it? What if I cant even go through that! I hate needles. Maybe the funny positions and hypno birth are the way to go. Help..
    Thanks for all of your comments and to the one who started this forum. Good luck!
    Baby Hernández is due Nov. 22!!

  2. #38
    Quote Originally Posted by amenspanglish View Post
    One thought though that no one has said. Yes, there were no drugs in the olden days, however, a lot of women died from childbirth, and influenza. I'm not trying to scare anyone; I just agree with those who say that it's our body and we know what we can handle and EVERY pregnancy is different. That being said, my mother had 4 natural births, in a hospital, all very painful, but did not have any health problems until the the fourth was born, and they told her it would be life - threatening to have any more kids. 3 years later, she was pregnant with my baby sister, and was fine. However, this time she opted for an epidural and loved the experience and recommended it to me. I get my pain tolerance from my dad. I take ibuprofen every month for my horrible back cramps and was sedated for my wisdom teeth surgery. That's how I am, so an epidural sounds great, especially if my labors are similar to my moms. Yikes. My conflict is this and though it sounds silly, I heard that the more pain you go through the more you will love your baby because of the sacrifice you made, and I was very disturbed by that! If I get epidurals, will I love my children less than my mom loved me? Would it be selfish to do that? I totally understand those who, like my mom, need it but what if I just want it? What if I cant even go through that! I hate needles. Maybe the funny positions and hypno birth are the way to go. Help..
    Thanks for all of your comments and to the one who started this forum. Good luck!
    I know I've kind of put my 2 cents in on this already, but I just have to say that labor pains have NO bearing on how much you love your baby. I can't imagine loving my first 2 more than my other 3 because I had no pain medication with them. For me, the love begins before they even arrive and then grows and grows with each passing day, from onesies to prom dresses and beyond. Just imagine, if it were true that the love is greater in the wake of the pain, everyone born before the advent of modern medicine would've had a loving, devoted mother, and we know that wasn't always the case. If you need pain medication, ask for it without guilt, my friend. Nothing can take away from the love! Oh, and for me at least, a needle you hardly feel and can't even see is MUCH better than anything a funny position or whatever can provide!

  3. #40
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Posts
    434
    Thanks beanie, that was the slap in the face that I was hoping someone would give me! I really appreciate it! And kudos for having 5 kids! I always wanted to have 5 just like my mom. When I think about it, I know I will love my children. I am a nanny and a former pre-school teacher and I attach to the children I work with very quickly and easily, and they're not even my own. I guess I just felt selfish, but just being a mom is a sacrifice enough! Thanks again! I especially like how you made a reference to time before medicine because I did in my comment too. Can I ask how old your kids are? We are 23, 22, 20, 17 and 14. I'm just curious about the spacing and, how you like it! As the oldest, I loved having all those siblings to play with and we are great friends (especially now that we dont live together! Lol).
    Baby Hernández is due Nov. 22!!

  4. #42
    How neat it must have been to grow up so close to your siblings! Two of my own siblings are old enough to be my parents, so it was little harder to find someone to play Monopoly with at my house. My own children are 21, 19, 8, 7, and 14 months. And... I'm about 27 weeks pregnant with my 6th and final baby! I'm even a grandmother, too. I never imagined I'd have such a large family, and the spacing just happened this way, but I think it's wonderful to have them spread out like they are. Just when I start missing those tiny baby feet, more come along, lol! I'm sure you will be a wonderful mom. Before I had my own, I didn't even want to babysit, and no one could imagine me as a mom, but now I can't think of anything that would make me happier. Many blessings to you as you start the most amazing journey of your life. )

  5. #44
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Posts
    434
    Dont worry, I could hardly ever play monopoly either. I had a sister close to my age, but my 4-year-old sister would "want to play" and ruin everything! Lol. Good times. And thank you for the compliments and for sharing with me! Congratulations on your 6th! I like the spacing, by twos, so that there can be a playmate with each age group. Have a smooth pregnancy with lots of medicine!
    Baby Hernández is due Nov. 22!!

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