Finding out the gender?

[red]

First off are Dad's allowed to post here?? If so then did you/will you find out the gender of your baby? My Mrs doesn't want to know she keeps saying but I'm going a little crazy wondering! Don't know if I'll be able to not tell her though if I do find out. Ah dilemma! What about the rest of you? Any ups/downs to finding out vs not?

[hulius]

With our first baby we wanted the surprise of not knowing. I'm so glad we decided to keep it unknown because it was the most wonderful and glorious moment for me to learn that I had just given birth to the litte girl i had always wanted. With the second, we had very little preference for a specific gender and perhaps that helped us to decide that we wanted to try it different this time. Instead, I was interested to know WHO I was carrying. I've enjoyed knowing throughout this pregnancy that a little girl is inside. But, I wouldn't change the suprise of my first for anything. It's so special to find out when the baby is placed on your chest. In fact, you don't even think about the sex for the first couple minutes until it hits you....oh yeah, let's see what we have here!

Anyhow, I just want to add that I really think you need to let the mother lead here. It just wouldn't have been the same throughout my pregnancy and the surprise at birth, if my husband had known all along. With all due respect, she is the one carrying the baby for 9 months, and it would be a shame to compromise her experience.

[phoebesmom]

We found out, but both of us absolutely wanted to. I am a planner who doesn't like surprises, so the joy and excitement of knowing there was a little girl on the way much outweighed any delivery day surprise factor. I mean, the day is going to be full of anticipation, anxiety, twists and turns, and absolute joy, whether you know the gender or not. Would your wife let you find out if you swore not to tell anyone?

[red]

Thanks ladies, My wife says she doesn't mind if I find out as long as I don't tell anyone. This is our second baby, we didn't find out the gender of our first until he came out. From a completely practical point of view as the person in charge of organising announcements etc. I was running around like a headless chicken trying to sort everything out instead of just enjoying the first few days together with him which rather spoiled the experience for me. Although we have a better idea what we are doing this time so are already more organised. But I am terrible at keeping things a secret...

[mamarachel]

I found out early on with each of my children and I'm glad we did. I like to plan and be organised, which is necessary with nine nearly ten children, so it made things easier for my family. Also I had older children and it helped them relate to their new brother or sister.

[lizaharriet]

Hi there! I literally just found out I am expecting again, and this will be the first time we find out the gender. I have always been fine not knowing, and my husband ALWAYS wanted to know but reluctantly agreed to keep it a surprise. I think I must be a lot bossier than your wife! Haha. I couldn't bear the idea of not finding out together.
This time I want to know as I am pining so much for a girl (Awful i know)
I feel like if i keep it a delivery surprise I might end up building up the idea of a girl. If I find out sooner I can just look forward to whoever is coming out!

[ninalemon]

We didn't find out with our first. I wanted to, but my husband really wanted it to be a surprise. I wasn't set on finding out, I just figured we would. Not finding out was a lot of fun. We didn't really have any issues with the nursery or clothes - we waited to decorate the nursery and only bough a few articles of clothing. For all of the baby gear I planned to go gender neutral anyway.

We did find out with our current pregnancy, just so we can experience both sides. Honestly, I kind of prefer not knowing, The moment with the sono wasn't nearly as exciting as being told in the delivery room "it's a boy!". For us, finding out at the anatomy scan was kind of anti-climatic. I am excited we are having another boy and I do enjoy saying "he" instead of "the baby" but I really think I prefer waiting until the end