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  1. #31
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Posts
    181

    Re: Boys who like "girly" things

    Thanks Marcia! I truly think people have the right to raise their kids the best way they see fit. I don't go around telling people they are horrible simply bc I disagree with them and their lifestyle choices. For example, I don't condone having out of wedlock babies and pre-marital sex, but I don't go around telling all of those moms how wrong I think they are and what not.

    But moving on...I also think some people here are confused(not you Marcia). I've seen people make comments about homophobia and what not in this thread. I don't think liking girly things makes anyone gay, and I haven't seen any other posters say this either. So why is homophobia even being brought up?? I think it is wrong to assume that someone is homophobic and what not simply because you have preconceived notions about people who plan to raise their children a certain way.
    ~Martina

  2. #33
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Posts
    26

    Re: Boys who like "girly" things

    True, the issue of homophobia does veer from the original topic. Unfortunately, it is a reality too many people have dealt with, even at a very young age.

    Whistlinggirls response really has gotten me thinking about cultural expectations for boys vs. girls. Is it that true that we can give give girls more room to experiment with defined gender roles because it is ok for girls to fail? Do we keep the definition of boy deliberately narrow because we pin cultural success on masculine leadership? I know the answers have to be complicated. Thinking about the smart and remarkable young girls and boys I know, I think unequal expectations based on gender continues tremendous unfairness to both.

  3. #35
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Posts
    202

    Re: Boys who like "girly" things

    There was a children's storybook that cam out fairly recently called (I believe) My Princess Boy. A mother wrote the story bc her son was/is obsessed with wearing girly dress-up clothes and she let him.

    I'm not a mom, the closest thing I have to parenting experiences is on my younger cousins who I watch frequently. My male cousin, who is now 6, loved shoes and wearing my necklaces up until around the age of 2. After that he lost interest in those things, but will still play "house" with his little sister. Enjoying those things for the short period that he did, didn't do him any harm and now he is very boy!

    I plan on raising my children with as much open-mindedness as possible. I would my my future son to be the type of man who is nurturing, caring and has the sense to help his wife and change a dirty diaper. Not the sort that deems that as a woman's task.
    -Ashley

  4. #37
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Posts
    490

    Re: Boys who like "girly" things

    From a guy's perspective this has been a very interesting and insightful discussion so far. There are several things I could draw out of this, but I will save for a separate post a discussion about the names aspect. One thing I wanted to comment on thus far though is a difference I have seen between the US and Europe. Being raised in both environments, and with an American mother who had lived for a long time in Europe I felt a much bigger expectation on guys in Europe to do what some would consider the traditional female chores and roles than compared with the US. I have some friends in Sweden and this is an extreme, but there the fathers even get up to a year off to take care of the baby. They have social structures in place to support this, but the expectation is there too. Growing up I was expected to help out with cooking, cleaning, laundry, ironing, shopping, but when I got to the States it seemed that hardly any boys I knew were expected to do much of that. I wouldn't say all my friends in the UK had to do all of that either, but seeing a guy helping his mother with getting some shopping wasn't so uncommon either. This may be offensive to some, but boys in the US seemed quite mothered and spoiled and I see that as an adult too. Guys just sit there and expect to be mothered still by their girlfriends and spouses. So the discussions about play and so on are interesting but I think the expectations are different too.
    Chelsea
    - Named after the place. A guy named Chelsea, who through his name became fascinated with names.

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