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  1. #11
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    228

    Re: Boys who like "girly" things

    My little brother (who is in his 20's) used to play dress up and beauty parlor and barbies with his big sisters. He also had long hair because, except for my bald dad, all the people in his life had long hair. He always seemed to want to be a witch for halloween. For him, he grew out of it. He cut his hair (though I miss it sometimes), and started wearing guys clothes. For him it was a phase, that seemed to change once he got to full day school.
    Personally, and maybe it's because I am gay, I don't have a problem with a boy playing with dolls, or dressing in moms clothes. I would of course try and spare him the ridicule of class mates, and maybe extablish boundaries as to where and when he should be doing it, but I think you gotta let kids be kids. We let girls play with balls, and bikes and in sandboxes.
    Sloane Thora Eunice, November 1, 2010, Greer Hattie Aurelia, February 29, 2012 and Rhys Colin Albert, May 9, 2013.

    Sister to Imogen, Poppy and Jasper



    I write things on my iPhone. I don't mean to miss words or press two letters at once.

  2. #13
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    2,374

    Re: Boys who like "girly" things

    I have a nephew who is, and always has been, into "girlier" things. He loves mermaids, I mean LOVES them too the point of almost obsessing about them. He is also very sensitive, loves hanging out with women, and isnt into sports in the slightest. His dad, who is a stereotypical mans man has tooken to his sons interests with some concern, but overall I think he just accepts him for who he is. His old brother derides him to no end (even though we are always trying to get this to stop, the two of them couldnt be more different). I personally have never been too concerned with the behavior. The rest of my family feels like they need to put a stop to it but I just dont see the point. When he wanted a mermaid for his birthday, I bought one. It made him happy and that is all I care about. The only thing that makes me sad is how other kids have treated him. My nephew has told me numerous times that he doesnt get along with the other kids in his class (he is rather dramatic, so it is hard to say what really happens at school). We are at a loss as to what to do about that. I dont want him to be bullied but I dont want him to pretend to be someone else either. I love who he is.
    I think children are who they are, you can try to shape them but at the end of the day there is a genetic basis for their behavior and personality (yes, environment plays a role too). I on the other hand was a total tomboy. I also had an older sister that was very girly, so maybe it is just common for siblings to want to set them selfs apart from their siblings? My two oldest nephews are completely disparate from one another, it is literally night and day with them.
    *Under Construction*

  3. #15
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Posts
    181

    Re: Boys who like "girly" things

    No children over here lol. I don't mind using unisex/softer names on guys. However, hubby and I still plan to raise our sons on more of the masculine side. I don't mind them being creative(as they will probably inherit that from me), but I think there are def things we won't allow. Hubby is super athletic, and I'm a former dancer so they will likely inherit some athleticism as well. I would like our girls to dance, and we will enroll our boys in sports as well. The boys will likely play basketball, football, soccer, or baseball bc those sports are huge in my family. I do not want my sons to dance though. Well, maybe if it is break dancing or something, but even then I would prefer them to do another sport instead. I would condone my sons playing music though. My family is verrryy musically gifted, and all of the guys play several instruments. I actually write music as a hobby as well, so I would love to share my love of music with my children one day lol.

    As far as toys go, the girls will play with "girly" toys and the boys will have their own "boyish" toys. We will not allow our sons to play with dolls at all. We def won't allow them to wear dresses or play in makeup either. I also don't like sandals or flip flops on guys, so our boys will not wear those either(unless we are at the beach, or public shower/hotel). So, I guess overall we will def aim to keep things traditional...
    ~Martina

  4. #17

    Re: Boys who like "girly" things

    Agree with Martina. My hubby and I, plan to raise our boys to be boys and girls to be girls. Don't agree with allowing boys to play with dolls, dressing in girl clothes or wear makeup either. Hopefully they'll grow up well.

  5. #19
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Posts
    101

    Re: Boys who like "girly" things

    Martina and Cherilyn - do you mind if I ask why you think like that? Is it the bullying potential or something else? No slight I just want to understand the other perspective.

    My older brother used to play dress up (none of us were allowed make-up until we were well into our teens) and tea parties with me and my sister and we both played sports/with his trucks etc. the same as him. I believe we had mixed tea parties with dolls, soldiers and dinosaurs present...! He was always really popular at school.

    My hub loved to dance as a child and his father didn't like that and was rather insistent that he stop (he was worried about teasing). He was pushed into sports which he didn't enjoy/wasn't good at and grew up feeling like he was never good enough (his brothers all were very sport orientated) which led to him resenting his father (although this has recently been resolved now). As an aside: we started dance classes a while ago and I can't recommend them enough! So much fun even when you have no co-ordination like us!

    My kids will be allowed to play as they see fit - I will encourage them in anything they show an interest in. I think I agree with Rachel that you can actually cause more problems with self esteem/socialising by limiting harmless activites based on the possibility that they may be teased for it... If they do end up being teased but want to carry on regardless then I will consider that to be their choice and one I will support them in in anyway I can.

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