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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Posts
    204

    Tips for talking someone out of a really "creative" spelling

    Hi all,

    I generally take a somewhat open minded approach to "unique" spellings, mostly because if you study English history at all it's clear that wildly different spellings for common names were a normal thing until the late 1800s when things started to standardize. Names like Katherine/Catherine/Kathryn are examples of holdovers from that. Caitlin spelled Katelyn or Kaitlynn would, if it had been used as a name in 17th century Britain, not have been strange.

    BUT... now a relative of mine is pregnant and considering just such a so-called-"unique" spelling for the name Hayden. I won't write out the exact spelling she's considering, but assume it has an i plus some other extra letters. It's very challenging to spell. I really don't think it's wise, and I'd like to gently try to talk her out of it. Thoughts on how to approach this without being obnoxious? She's someone who never thinks about names, but also has a very standardly spelled name herself so has never experienced the whole "spell that for me again" issue.

    Thanks everybody!
    Last edited by rosierose; December 25th, 2014 at 04:40 PM.

  2. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Posts
    204
    I'd also love to hear some ideas about how to talk about names with people who don't care about them, but maybe should! (if only for 9 months). I think she heard Hayden on TV somewhere or at church and that's how she latched onto it, but wanted to make sure it was "different" and "feminine", hence the spelling changes...

  3. #5
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Location
    Liverpool, England
    Posts
    4,655
    Quote Originally Posted by rosierose View Post
    Hi all,

    I generally take a somewhat open minded approach to "unique" spellings, mostly because if you study English history at all it's clear that wildly different spellings for common names were a normal thing until the late 1800s when things started to standardize. Names like Katherine/Catherine/Kathryn are examples of holdovers from that. Caitlin spelled Katelyn or Kaitlynn would, if it had been used as a name in 17th century Britain, not have been strange.
    I always took this as people not being able to spell the names they were writing down so they just had their best guess. I don't think it was a specific choice by the parents. Also, Caitlin couldn't have been spelt with a 'k' as the letter doesn't exist in Irish.

    BUT... now a relative of mine is pregnant and considering just such a so-called-"unique" spelling for the name Hayden. I won't write out the exact spelling she's considering, but assume it has an i plus some other extra letters. It's very challenging to spell. I really don't think it's wise, and I'd like to gently try to talk her out of it. Thoughts on how to approach this without being obnoxious?
    Maybe ask her why she wants to misspell it and remind her that - whatever the spelling - the sound remains the same.
    ~Boys~

    ★ August Eli Benedict ★ Bram ★ Casimir Mordecai ★ Edmond John Meirion ★ Gillon ★
    ★ Jory Leander ★ Julian Charles ★ Macsen ★ Magnus ★ Vasiliy ★


    ~Girls~

    ★ Aira Rose ★ Arietta ★ Clover ★ Delphina ★ Eleni ★ Fiorella ★ Hester Isobel ★
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  4. #7
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Location
    South Australia
    Posts
    1,286
    This may prove useless; but this is just some of my ideas. I'd draw on personalized items for a start, say that you were looking for an item for the baby; but you couldn't find any. That everything was spelt Hayden and when you asked sales clerks they said they didn't have any by that name - I think that's an important thing, if it's tough for a shop assistant to spell/say then it's a problem, because he will be approached with questions all the time.

    Later on, it may be useful to have a chat about a name you like, say Charlotte for example (any name you don't really love, don't tell her a name you really love or she may use it!) but discuss how you like the easy pronunciation, nicknames etc. and ask what made her love Hayden. Depending on her response, say that you like it, but are having trouble pronouncing it. That your brain wants to pronounce it "blah blah blah." If she gets uncomfortable drop it or the vibe changes drop it. But it's important that she nows that for some people, the pronunciation will difficult, where I live everyone pronounces things phonetically so it would be a really big issue.

    I hope that helps, this was tough, best of luck!
    Last edited by sodallas3; December 26th, 2014 at 04:11 AM.
    Jessica Emily Faith
    Living in the land of Oz...
    Ronan: For the sake of spicy, little boys wearing plaid shirts, running around in kneeless jeans, playing in the mud and being mischievous.
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