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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2014
    Posts
    11

    Discussing names with DH is like pulling teeth. And I'm 34 weeks pregnant.

    Does anyone else have a hard time talking names with their husband? Mine just shoots every name down I suggest and won't offer any himself. Sometimes he'll just suggest ludicrous names (like Danger or Fiero after his dumb car), thinking it's funny even though it's never been funny to me and only makes me upset. So I get angry and my graduated-with-honors husband begrudgingly texts me a short list of poorly spelled names. This has happened twice during this pregnancy. TWICE! I've suggested countless names that he just shoots down like a gang banger. There's no discussion ever. This is our third child and I'm so sick and tired it. I'm also hugely pregnant, nauseous and feeling taken for granted (i.e. sorry for myself). I really needed to vent, thanks Name Berries. Any tips?

  2. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Location
    Anaheim, CA
    Posts
    2,410
    Yikes. I've never been in a situation like that, but it sounds ROUGH. If I were in your place, I'd be tempted to throw out an ultimatum (ie "if you don't take this seriously starting right now, I'm going to name this kid myself without your input and you can just live with it.")

    But then, I'm not the most agreeable person ever. Have you tried calmly explaining that his behavior is really stressing you out, and pointing out how potentially disastrous it is for you to be feeling stressed right now?

    Also, how did you name your other children? Is there any way you can apply the same strategy now?

    It sounds like venting is doing you some good. Is there a real life person you can vent to?

    Ultimately, if he's not going to take choosing a name seriously, it's going to fall to you. Make sure you feel good about your own list/combos/etc.
    Gwen
    College student, bookworm, terrible influence.
    Owner of a cat: Minerva "Minnie"


    Current favorites:
    Belphoebe Cosima Sybella Ailsa Celia
    Prosper Finn August Malcolm Zephyr

  3. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2013
    Posts
    175
    This is my husband, to a capital T! With our son Sebastian we had his name picked out long before we were married, and then we adopted Kaidan and he already had his name.

    Now, in the next few days we are expecting our daughter, and he has decided that the name we settled on weeks ago is just not the name for her. So frustrating! So here I am, due in 9 days, and he is second guessing our name choice. So stressful!
    Before we decided on Piper Adelaide he wouldn't even suggest things he liked, but would just tell me no. Good luck to you, I still haven't figured out how to get it into his head that he is upsetting me and stressing me out.

    Mama to Sebastian, Kaidan, Evelyn, Britton, and Jackson

  4. #7
    Join Date
    Jul 2013
    Posts
    1,172
    If he won't come up with anything you make a short list of (10ish) names - combos or not - and he must pick one of them. And you have to use that one, no backsies.
    New username is @ truenature

  5. #9
    Join Date
    Feb 2014
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    54
    You are not alone.... We are having our third and my husband disappears whenever the name issue arises. Sometimes men just astound me!

    It can make you feel very alone and unsupported. I completely agree with katieydenberg, make a short list, give it to him and say he has a few days to choose what he's comfortable with. Then you pick a name that's close to your heart. He will hopefully come around at birth time.

    I wish you well, it's not easy but it's probably a good idea to take the leaf here.

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