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  1. #1

    Afraid I am destined for baby name regret :(

    Hi berries!

    I hope you can help me here! I have one son and my husband and I have decided that we would like to start TTC soon. Super exciting! The only problem is - girl names. I am an absolute mess about them. I have always loved names and so I have been searching since I was little for *the* girl name and I don't have it. I've come to realize that I don't think there is that *one* special girl name out there for me - I will just have to pick one of many names that I like and make it work.
    This is totally the opposite of how I was with my son. I had his name picked out since I was about 18 years old and never thought twice about it while pregnant. Even so, it still felt weird to call him by it for the first few days and I very briefly wondered if I had made a mistake (I think this is pretty common with a newborn, although I haven't actually confirmed this...). Given that I am all over the place with girl names, I really fear that I am going to have a major episode of name regret if we do have a daughter, no matter what name we decide on!
    I feel like I have seen every possible girl name and this is my list right now. All of the names I like but there is something about each that makes me feel like it isn't exactly right.

    Imogen - I had felt pretty good about this maybe being it and was excited for the nn Immy. But we may be moving to a state down South in the next few years and I've heard there it is pronounced "Eye-ma-gene" which is a deal breaker for me because it just isn't my style. And I don't have it in me to constantly correct the pronunciation!
    Seraphina - This name has been on my list for the longest of any. I love that it is so feminine and reminds me of a fairytale. But... I also feel like it is too much and I've found that I am embarrassed to tell people we are even considering this name, which can't be a good sign. I have this fear that it sounds a little low-class and people may start being kre8iv with it (Sarafeena, etc.)
    Willa - So pretty, feminine, not over-the-top. But seems possibly a little incomplete and I don't like Wilhelmina as a full name.
    Elsa - I like this this is Scandinavian, as I have Swedish roots and is very sweet. But a bit too simple for my tastes?
    Greta - really adorable - but is it too German, considering that neither my husband nor myself is German? Also, it is a point against it that it starts with "G" like my son's name.
    Elowen - I love the sound of this - it also reminds me of a fairytale. But it isn't quite an established name and that bothers me.
    Anneliese - Beautiful, feminine, but the same problem as Greta. I only like it with this spelling, but would it be strange to have such a German name? Also - I see this name and its variants rising quickly.
    Annabel - lovely but the popularity concerns me. i think this name will continue to climb.
    Norah - love it but I feel like I hear it everywhere now. I looked up the statistics for my state and confirmed that it is fairly high here.
    Sadie - I saw a video that had an absolutely adorable little girl named Sadie in it and it really made me take a huge liking to the name. But I am suspicious because it doesn't seem to match my usual tastes since it isn't a flowery name.

    There is just this huge pressure with naming a girl that I feel - and I totally didn't feel it with naming a boy! I've already decided that if we have another boy his name will almost definitely be Simon. It just feels "right" and I am not second guessing it or thinking about all of its flaws the way that I am with a girl name. Maybe it's because I am a girl myself and so to me I just feel how important a name is for a girl and I want to give her the perfect one. If I name her a frilly name like Anneliese, will she have a totally different life than if I give her a cute and spunky name like Sadie?? Ok, do you see the problem?? I am totally going crazy already!

    Thank you for reading this far if you have! Maybe now you can see my fears - I am all over the place with these girl names and I really like them all, but none of them stand out as the right one to me. And yes I do realize that I am putting an unnatural amount of pressure on this name... I would love to get other opinions or suggestions! Although I feel like I have seen all of the names possible at this point - it is sometimes possible to see them with new eyes

    Thank you!!
    Last edited by gabrielsmommy; February 9th, 2014 at 10:14 AM.

  2. #3
    Join Date
    Dec 2013
    Location
    Boston, MA
    Posts
    205
    It's natural to be worried. I think there's a wider range of female names, so it is hard to match one to your special girl.

    The thing about naming is, your daughter's name doesn't have to be your FAVORITE name. It just has to be a name that she can identify herself with and at the same time make her own. For example, my name is Erinn. My mom tells me that if she could rename me, it would be Jillian, only on account of that's her current favorite name. Favorites change easily, just like your favorite food. But if potato gnocchi was your favorite food three years ago, chances are you're still going to at least like potato gnocchi now. And when that favorite item is a name bestowed upon your daughter, whom you love with all your heart? You will never think anything bad of it.

    Anneliese is a frilly name, but say one day she doesn't want that. That day, Anneliese can become Annie - instantly spunky! Pick whatever name suits your needs best, and you can't get it 'wrong.'
    21-year-old name collector
    Dreaming of:
    Alanna "Lana" Jade • Charlotte Avery • Audrey Liora
    James Aro • Henry Maxen • Julian Everett
    Other names: Talia, Brighton, Melia, Bay, Arielle, Beckett, Tanner, Asher

  3. #5
    Imogen - I can see how you would feel that way about the pronunciation. I'm not from the south so I can't confirm if that is the case or not but if it would be a big deal to you that it got mispronounced then I guess I would choose something else.
    Seraphina - This doesn't sound low-class at all to me. I think my own name (Luce@) seems a bit low-class, because my parents made up the spelling--but I have gotten so many compliments on how pretty it is. Also, names will be misspelled no matter how common they are so I don't think that potentially botched spellings from others should stop you from using a name. Seraphina is a really pretty name, but it makes me think of the royal cat from "Barbie in the Princess and the Pauper", and does seem to me like a little much for everyday use.
    Willa - This seems like a full name to me, not necessarily like it needs a longer formal name.
    Elsa - I love Elsa, and I think the association to the new Disney princess makes it feel less simplistic. But I do see where you are coming from.
    Greta - I think the same-initial thing is the biggest point against this name. I think it is common enough that you could definitely use it in spite of not being German.
    Elowen - I love this one too. It sounds like the name of a moon flower or a fairy or something else equally beautiful. It's not super established, but I think it would work really well on a little girl and she could definitely make it her own. The fact that it's similar to Eowyn and Arwen makes it not completely unfamiliar.
    Anneliese - Anneliese seems less German to me than Greta, but is probably more popular, like you said.
    Annabel - I've only met one Annabel (I think it's a name that works really well in real life).
    Norah - Really pretty!
    Sadie - I don't know, I think it fits in with the style of your other names okay. Like a princess who is a bit spunky. It does feel a little nicknamey to me with the -ie ending, but that is only a minor thing.

    One thing I've heard over and over is that if you make a list of your top names and then wait to see what the baby looks like when they are born, one name will seem to fit them better than the others. Just a thought!
    Theophile, Arthur, Leland, Sequoyah, Septimus, Taliesin
    Romy, Elsa, Mona, Haruhi, Massima, Ravenna, Julie, Caroline/Pauline, Anjalie Ara

  4. #7
    Wow that is such great advice - thank you!!!!!! That is really just the advice I needed - amazing I asked my mom and her favorites now are Hannah, Orit, Tamar, and Jessica... A surprisingly strange mix but I'm sure that I could have made any of them work for me and hopefully it will be the same way for my daughter - thanks again for the fresh insight!

  5. #9
    To Lu - thanks for your feedback! I agree that it may be time to take imogen off the list for that reason since it would really bother me. And I think I will end up doing that if it is a daughter - bringing a list to the hospital. It's very different than how it was with my son, and it will be a little strange not to be settled until we meet her... But I think it is the way to go and hopefully one of them will fit her when I see her and mommy won't go too crazy with the possibilities

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