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  1. #46
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Posts
    110
    My advice is pretty different. Ask your daughter! She is 2.5 years old. Most kids her age talk and have opinions. Even if you don't want to ask her because she is young and impressionable, you know her better than anyone! Obviously, you are a overly-sensitive and introverted person (I don't mean that in a negative way at all), but is your daughter?? Is she sensitive like you, or is she laid back like your husband? Obviously, most people in the world (based off of the responses you have received on nameberry) would not mind having your daughter's name, but that doesn't matter so much. The real question is: WILL YOUR DAUGHTER MIND HAVING HER NAME? Seriously, she is old enough that you can tell. I got called "Lame Dittwitt" throughout elementary school because of my name and I didn't care at all. I just rolled my eyes and laughed it off. I babysat an Evelyn who's brother called her EVIL-lyn, but she just rolled her eyes and said, "That's not my name, brother." My guess is that YOU were a sensitive kid or you just love your child so much that you are overly-sensitive about things to do with her, but I think you should focus on the worst case scenario. If your daughter is teased, how would SHE respond? Would she roll her eyes and say, "That's not my name. There is obviously a J and no I, (can't you read?)" Most kids are extroverted and resilient. Or would she internalize it like you have? If she is sensitive, then ask her if she wants to be named Gemma/Jemma/Emma-Jo/EJ/Josephine. Obviously, another issue is that you don't want to be honest with your husband about how you feel, which you NEED to do in order to see a counselor and/or talk to your daughter. So my ultimate piece of advice is to talk to your husband about seeing a counselor. I bet he will be in favor of the idea, especially if you tell him you are STILL agonizing over Emma's name. I'm sorry if I have offended you, I really don't want to. I hope I helped.

  2. #48
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    4,088
    Quote Originally Posted by unsuremum View Post
    i am filled with baby name remorse, and i too feel embarrassed and im so angry with myself. I wish i knew how to get over it, as i thought it would eventually go but it hasnt 18 months on. My son is Xavier Liam. Liam was always going to be his name but stupidly listened to everyones opinions but my own. So many people mispronounce his name, the worst X xavier, i just cringe. Its alwful overthinking this. I was going to change it at 8 months, but worried about what people would think and thought i would just get over it. But always in my mind Liam comes to my brain, but little Xavie he is. I hope for us and people in this situation we can find a way to get past this terrible feeling in the pit of your stomach. Love to hear some advice on how to do this too.
    I think you’ve got a really simple solution all ready to go. Just call your son Liam. It’s his mn it’s all ready for you to use. Seriously! Many people go by their mn’s. Xavier is a cool name but if it’s just not right for you and you’re 18 month old likes Liam then it’s not like you are pulling a name out of a hat. I meet a little boy two years ago whose name was H.a.rry August. But he vehemently decided he was August, not Auggie not Gus - he was three years old. His mom was a classmate of mine and said that they had called him by his fn until he decided he wanted to be August, and he’s the one who gets upset at nn’s not them. I don’t know little children enough to know how opinionated they are about their names at 18 months but you can suggest it to your son and see how he feels. Honestly, at some point it needs to be his choice, not yours. (But... I didn’t have mn’s until I was 8 and my definitely choose what my mom liked so there is a chance that your opinion will sway his as well).
    MAJOR CONSTRUCTION ZONE
    newlywed!!! (not trying...yet)

  3. #50
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Posts
    2
    I go to call him Liam, but feel like im going to confuse him and scar him. I was going to keep the knickname Xavie which is mostly what we call him, but again unsure if this is just more confusing. The more i think about it the more confused i am. I reaaly appreciate your comments.

  4. #52
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Posts
    2,130
    If you're obsessing this much over a nonissue, there's something else going on here. I would consider talking to a therapist who specializes in postpartum issues.

    Matilda Sailor or Faye Matilda | Sylvie Winifred or Simon Atlas | Atlas Dov or Alice Violetta | Lucien Wilde or Lucinda Jane | Jane Lucinda or Jack Mariner | Marlowe Charles or Roscoe Thomas | Charles ' Charlie' Wallace or Marigold 'Maggie' Wynn | Eloise Lily or Elliot Darwin | Iris Cordelia or Thea Marina | Jasper Augustus or Juniper 'June' Lovelace | Julian Felix or Judah 'Jude' Reeve

    Just a grad student dreaming ahead...

  5. #54
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Posts
    1,277
    Quote Originally Posted by augusta_lee View Post
    If you're obsessing this much over a nonissue, there's something else going on here. I would consider talking to a therapist who specializes in postpartum issues.
    This, exactly.

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