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September 28th, 2013 10:41 PM #16Senior Member
- Join Date
- Sep 2013
You are both female so will likely have different surnames when you have children, no? This makes it less problematic to have cousins with the same first name. The name is her father's first and you're father's middle so I figure it is a fairly common name? This makes it less problematic as well. Perhaps it is a name like Matthew so you could have a Matthew and she could have a Matt?
Would I do it? No. I was in a somewhat similar scenario and when my favorite name was "stolen" I decided to let it go and pick a new name. But in my scenario the children would share the same surname so that really made a big difference in my decision.
September 28th, 2013 11:45 PM #18Moderator
- Join Date
- Sep 2012
She doesn't love the name. but I know she will use it because she wants to name a son after her father.
I don't believe my sister will have children for at least 8-10 years, but she stlll wants to claim James for herself. While she and her partner have been together for 9 years they don't have the financial stability and quite frankly they aren't mature enough. Only one of them works and she barely makes enough to get by. They don't have a savings account and probably couldn't afford insemination. They also don't want to adopt.
I am planning to have a child in the next 2-5 years which is before her, but I can't guarantee that I will have a son before her. I have always planned to have at least two biological children, foster and adopt children. I have always wanted a big family whether biological or not. I won't put dibs on James, but I do want to use it when I have a son.
This isn't the first time someone has used the name and she wasn't happy. Her SIL used it for her sons middle name and I believe a friend of her is planning on using for her unborn child. I don't think she realizes how popular of a name James is.
Could I have your thoughts in this thread?
(name) = second middle
Alaric Matthew | Edmund Leander | Henrik Balthazar
Aleksander Tadhg | Sebastian Rhys | Peter Malachi | Caspar
Silas Frédéric| Gideon Arthur | James Nikodem | Giles
Rowena Isabel | Helen Rosalind | Lydia Primrose
Freyja Hermione | Gemma Viviane | Beatrix Lyra
Lilith Seraphine | Adalind Fox | Katarina Ivy
September 28th, 2013 11:52 PM #20Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jun 2013
September 29th, 2013 12:32 AM #22
I think it's alright for you to use the name, because:
1. They won't share the same last name
2. It's a common name and a lot of kids will have it (as your sister is beginning to see)
3. She already knew you were planning to use it before she decided to use it
4. You say the cousins would only see each other about once a year
Of course, maybe you both won't have a boy. Or maybe one of you will decide you like a different name better. Or your partner won't like the name. So I wouldn't even worry about it too much at this point.Favorite names at the moment:
Other names I like: Veronica Vivian Lydia Octavia Bianca Flora Zulima Augustine Elsa Avalon Zamora Carmina
September 29th, 2013 06:50 AM #24