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Thread: Rough housing
August 27th, 2013 06:35 PM #16
August 27th, 2013 06:44 PM #18Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jul 2012
I allow rough housing and my boys love it. However, its only fun when everyone is having fun. If your child is uncomfortable, teach her to say so. Have her say "No, I don't like that". If they don't listen have her come get you. Every child has the right to say they don't like something. Its actually an important thing to teach all children to help protect them from grown ups that would harm them - if something makes your child uncomfortable teach her to say so and find someone she trusts. This could be an innocent and relatively safe way to teach an important lesson.
August 27th, 2013 06:54 PM #20Senior Member
- Join Date
- Dec 2012
@ebenezer.scrouge - You stated, "I recently went back to my hometown and realised just how violent country kids are."
Wow, I am so sorry that that has been your experience. I live in the "country" a rural town in the Southwest United States, and if anything kids who grow up in the "country" tend to be more respectful. Have I seen rough housing from "country" children? The answer would be yes, but it was never to the point of it being inappropriate. And, in the town I live in I have seen adults get onto children (who weren't theirs) and ask them to stop any bad behavior and almost every single time the child stops immediately, even though the adult that asked them to stop is not their parent/guardian, teacher, or relative. I just say this because while you were speaking from your own personal experience, I do not think it's appropriate to label all "country" kids as violent.
August 28th, 2013 12:14 AM #22
@jtucker, its not too bad we were on an oval and the parents tend to turn a blind eye at these sorts of occasions. Keep in mind I'm fourteen and I was stirring them up because it is fun. These kids are all under the age of 10 boarding school should make them better in a few yearsEbony〜Fourteen year old lover of names books and chocolate
Isobel, Eloise, Matilda, Alice, Eleanor, Amelia, Elena, Mirabel, Felicity, Phoebe, Tallulah and Eilidh
Eamon, Tiago, Cooper, Jack, Jago, Flynn, Archer, Lincoln, Asher, Alfie and Taylor
Pondering: Quinn and Naya
August 29th, 2013 02:31 PM #24Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jul 2011
@taz, that is not the way I have handled things. I do speak
Up because the majority of kids in question are family so I'm not worried about offending people. But I would NEVER says you are getting too rough for my daughter... That would single her out and make her feel awful! I tell the kids they need to calm down or take it easy all the time. I don't have it in me not to! It's like an instinct to react and tell them to calm down or take it easy, if my child were there or not.
@pansy, yes I talked to the parents about my concerns and they will curb their kids a bit at my house but otherwise they don't. It comes down to a different way of doing things and different comfort levels of what is acceptable. I think some of it has been good for my daughter to learn our way is not the only way and she does back away when they get too rough... Usually. But she gets caught in it at other times and I feel badly because its just not her personality to be so rough.
@alzora, keeping her away from it is nearly impossible. These are her cousins and very best friends that she is so thrilled to see so I could not keep her away. When I ask her afterward about the play she never says its too rough, I think for fear I might keep her out of it. At my own house I keep them from going upstairs in the bedroom because that is where they go nuts...
At other houses the other parents are happy when the kids go upstairs bc they are out of the way. Sigh... It's a parenting conflict.
I'm not completely opposed to some roughhouse play, I just feel like the play I'm seeing is overboard and I guess I'm try into get perspective on what others feel is overboard or acceptable. Thanks for everyone that's responded so far, very interesting.