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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Posts
    546

    Question I'm Kind od Irked...

    and maybe I shouldn't be?

    I was at the doctor's office this morning and my very friendly four year old daughter asked me if she could play with another little girl in the waiting room. I told her why not go ahead and ask the little girl if she wanted to. When Jade asked, the girl just stared at her like she was from mars for even inquiring! Even during trips to the park, other children stare despondently at my little girl who only wants to play. They don't even answer her question. "Do you want to play?" It's yes, or no. Right?

    As a child I remember playing with kids I didn't know at the playground. It's like they were my new best friends for two hours or so.

    What do you think? Have any of you experienced something similar? Are children today less social, or is my girl unusually chipper?

    I'm not really mad, or upset, and I'm certainly not trying to put anyone down. I'm simply curious.

  2. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2013
    Posts
    622
    My three-year-old son is pretty outgoing most of the time but he can get shy sometimes mostly if he's tired or overwhelmed like somewhere very busy. Typically he doesn't go up and ask another child to play they just suddenly start playing together. Like they start doing some parallel play that slowly transforms into interacting with one another.
    Mother to: Patrick Werner (3/10) and Mary Claire (06/12)

  3. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    Posts
    4,422
    I probably would have reacted like the girl at the Dr's office. I'm shy by nature, plus I had an extremely overbearing (sometimes violent/abusive) parent who tended to go off for any reason or none at all. I was constantly in terror of setting her off or doing anything that might result in punishment when I got home. Talking or playing w/another child without her approval was on the list of things not to do. I hope the little girl was just shy.

  4. #7
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    Posts
    227
    My 4 year old is always making new friends on playgrounds. She always calls them her "new friends" even though half the time she doesn't know their name.

    I have definitely seen the kids that are pretty unresponsive too. In my experience, if you look at the parents (if they are even around) you can tell why the kid is anti social. They don't tend to have the encouraging parents who say things like "say hi, honey" or "introduce yourself". How does the kid learn social graces without a solid example?

    Your daughter sounds lovely and I hope she doesn't get discouraged by the lack of responses from other kids.

  5. #9
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Location
    Liverpool, England
    Posts
    4,266
    Quote Originally Posted by vitamom3 View Post
    I have definitely seen the kids that are pretty unresponsive too. In my experience, if you look at the parents (if they are even around) you can tell why the kid is anti social. They don't tend to have the encouraging parents who say things like "say hi, honey" or "introduce yourself". How does the kid learn social graces without a solid example?
    This is a bit harsh. I was a naturally shy child. My mum tried all sorts to encourage me to play with other kids but I just ended up clinging onto her. Nothing she did or didn't do could change the fact that I was shy, that was just the way I was made. Generally, I still prefer sitting by myself than having to talk to other people.
    ~Boys~

    Jory Leander Atticus, August Eli Benedict, Casimir Mordecai Stewart,
    Edmond John Meirion, Horatio Ethell Emery, Bram William Jasper,
    Julian Remy Charles, Vasiliy Lochlan Michael.


    ~Girls~

    Aira Rose ___, Eleni Fiorella Charlotte, Sylvia Sayuri Noor,
    Merit Eleanora Adelaide, Clover Elodie Seraphine, Bridie Scarlett Viola,
    Marguerite Cecilia Iris, Eilidh Clara Valentine.


    Sorry to anyone who read TSI. First draft was terrible. Second drafting now.

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