Names Searched Right Now:
Page 1 of 2 1 2 LastLast
Results 1 to 5 of 10
  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2013
    Posts
    138

    HELP!!! big brother doesn`t want a brother

    My younger son is really not excited about becoming a big brother. When my older son Bridger became a big brother to Avery, he was really excited and wanting to hug the baby and give him kisses, but Avery is the exact opposite. Although the baby isn`t born yet, he is really not excited. He also has to share a room with the new baby. He won`t even touch my belly when the baby is kicking or something. Bridger can`t even sleep without feeling the baby kick.
    So, the questions is, do you think he`ll come around, or should I do something to make him excited.
    Please tell me if you have ever dealt with this kind of situation and please give me advice!!!
    married to my wonderful husband--P.J.
    mommy to--- Bridger Alexander(7) , Avery Matthew(3) and Owen Samuel arrived on September 5th!!!

    current favorites---
    boys--Bridger,Avery, Owen, Tristan, Cory,Brody, Justin, Porter, Morrison, Axel, Finn and Ira

    girls---Natalie, Brooklyn, Penelope, Paige, Heather, Emerson, Eleanor, Beth, Jenna and Meredith

  2. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    265
    Aww, it sounds like he is already feeling a tinge of jealousy. I'm sure he will come around though! It might just take getting used to. Maybe it will just take some extra assurance that he will not be replaced. Maybe it isn't just that he doesn't want a brother, but maybe he is also uneasy about his mommies body changing. A suggestions I have, is to make sure that you still have special one-on-one time with Avery. Also another fun thing we did with my son when we were expecting our daughter, was we went to the store and had him pick out a gift for the new baby. I picked a toy out from the baby to my son as well, and when our daughter was born they exchanged gifts. Congrats too you! I hope he warms up to the whole idea of being a big brother soon
    In love with my little ones Delmer, June, and Atticus

  3. #5
    Join Date
    May 2013
    Posts
    138
    That`s a great idea, Anna.Bliss. thanks.
    married to my wonderful husband--P.J.
    mommy to--- Bridger Alexander(7) , Avery Matthew(3) and Owen Samuel arrived on September 5th!!!

    current favorites---
    boys--Bridger,Avery, Owen, Tristan, Cory,Brody, Justin, Porter, Morrison, Axel, Finn and Ira

    girls---Natalie, Brooklyn, Penelope, Paige, Heather, Emerson, Eleanor, Beth, Jenna and Meredith

  4. #7
    one i assume you feel hes obviously upset, not just disinterested. depending on how old he is he may not 'get it' that you are really having a baby. kids can be wrapt up in their own world sometimes.


    also i read actress (i know but it actually sounds like a great idea) Mayim Bialik's (Blossom/Big Bang Theory's) blog about dealing with weaning her son (she waited until he was much older than 'normal' people do) but the idea of helping a child transition through a new phase in their life would still work.

    think you could try one or all of these ideas:

    1-basically sit him down and explain as best you can whats happening, help him understand he isnt being replaced.

    2-Mayim bought her son a toy for him to play with and hold to replace the comfort he received from breast feeding and ive heard of parents doing this for other situations too, so if hes at a level he can understand maybe get him a toy that he reaches for when he may feel left out or forgotten due to all the new baby fuss since he may not be able to vocalize what hes feeling.

    3-she also threw him a small party which seems excessive, but it does kinda make sense to commemorate and celebrate him becoming a 'big boy' and transitioning into the role of 'big brother' as well as him getting some special time with you before all the craziness of having a newborn at home takes over. make it part of growing up, something special, because this will be a new purpose and a forever job in his little life - to be a brother.

    4-THE BEST ONE. she made him a book of his life so far. it showed him growing up (and him with his own big brother).

    if you have pictures of your oldest when he was born, you can actually show him what you'd like to happen, show him that his big brother loved and took care of him and now its his turn. most kids have a 'i was a baby but im a big kid moment' and even tell us so - remember when i was a baby and could tie my shoes? or used a bottle? as well as moments where they want to copy and be more think their older siblings and i think this book is a great way to utilize both these natural instincts in kids.

    5-finally her advice was dont freak out and accept that he may struggle with his new role. help him along and as long as he isnt starting to show aggressive or dangerous tendencies a lil jealousy is pretty natural and eventually should work itself out on his own.
    Last edited by orphanedhanyou; August 17th, 2013 at 03:55 AM.
    i do not ignore the Rich Text toolbar provided me. i bold, italicize, enlarge, underline and CAPITALIZE for emphasis, individuality, and to capture attention among the endless Arial Standard Size Font that everyone else uses.
    i am not screaming nor will i cosset you. i do this to highlight the most important aspect of my thoughts so they are not lost again in the never ending sea of tiny, black, tempered letters that make up forums everywhere.
    ~*~ i encourage you to do the same ~*~

  5. #9
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    New Zealand
    Posts
    598
    I would keep baby in with you for the first 6 months. Decreases the risk of SIDS and may stop your little boy feeling put out if he doesn't have the baby taking over his bedroom straight away.
    Mother to two lovely kiddos, Mila Arden and Cato Bennett

    Currently dreaming of...
    Atlas Calloway, Atlas Bram, Atlas Octavian
    Lyra Marigold, Lyra Blythe, Lyra Clementine

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •