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Thread: To Find Out the Sex or Not?
July 29th, 2013 04:47 AM #16
We found out with our first, and we're finding out with this pregnancy as well. As a first time mom it really helped me feel more prepared: nursery painted, names picked out, and hubs found it easier to bond with the baby-to-be as "she" rather than like this nebulous mysterious little creature in there. And if you're worried about too much pink or whatever at your shower, you know you don't have to tell everyone just because YOU find out right? Or if you do tel everyone you could say you're not into the really froufrou ultra girlie/ super manboy stuff. Besides, gender prediction using ultrasound is not 100% accurate. I know 4 people personally who's babies came out NOT the gender the ultrasound tech said they would be.
As for it being motivation in labour, I can't really say as my labour was super easy. But I would think I would be just as excited and motivated to "get this thing outta here" whether I knew or not what their gender would be.Azula Rosemary 1 July 2012
Expecting 2 January 2014
July 29th, 2013 07:47 AM #18Senior Member
- Join Date
- May 2013
I have two boys, Bridger who`s 6 and Avery who`s 3 years old. I am also expecting a boy right now.
Anyway, for my older one, I decided to find out the gender. My husband wasn`t up for it but I convinced him. I was, and still am happy with the choice I made for Bridger because it gave us time to think for names, clothes and all sorts of stuff. It was nice to know, because when you bump into somebody somewhere, you can tell them if it`s a boy a girl.
For my second one, we waited until the birth to find out. I loved that we waited because we had a big surprise the day he arrived.
For the one I am pregnant with now is a boy. The only reason we decided to find out is because Bridger wouldn`t stop bugging us if it was a boy or a girl. haha.
I am happy that we got to experience both!! But I would choose finding out.married to my wonderful husband--P.J.
mommy to--- Bridger Alexander(6) , Avery Matthew(3) and Owen Samuel arrived on September 5th!!!
boys--Bridger,Avery, Owen, Tristan, Cory,Brody, Justin, Porter, Morrison, Preston, Finn and Darren
girls---Natalie, Brooklyn, Penelope, Paige, Heather, Clementine, Eleanor, Beth, Lynette and Meredith
July 29th, 2013 08:43 AM #20Senior Member
- Join Date
- Mar 2012
We have chosen to wait for the surprise - this for us overrides any of the benefits of finding out, especially as we are happy to buy neutral newborn clothes and the decorate the room in a gender neutral Beatrix Potter theme. The only annoying consequence has been missing out on good Ebay deals on blue or pink strollers, etc. However, it has also made me realise that when it comes time to sell our stuff on Ebay, it will be much better to have unisex baby equipment!November 2007 - Started TTC
April 2012 - 1st IVF Cycle (BFN)
August 2012 - 2nd IVF Cycle (BFN)
March 2013 - 3rd IVF Cycle (BFP!!!)
Antonia ("Annie") Eloise Gray born 9 November 2013
July 29th, 2013 05:11 PM #22Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jun 2013
I am so bad at surprises, I love them but if I know someone is planning a surprise for me I will bug them until I know what it is. I feel like it'll be this way with finding out the gender, too. I would love to wait until the end and be surprised, but I don't know if I can be that patientPREGNANT with our first!!!
My name is Caroline, BeatrixDaisy is just a name I like!
My favorite names:
Emilia, Beatrix, Juliette, Chloe, Madeline, Audrey, Emerson, Alaina, Felicity, Coralie, Alessandra, Katherine, Lucy, Luna
Holden, Noah, Nathaniel, Caleb, Cameron, Adam, Calvin, Travis, Ronan, Hudson, James, Paul, Peter, Mason, Troy
July 30th, 2013 06:53 AM #24Senior Member
- Join Date
- May 2013
Update since I was the original poster: We went team green! And I'm pretty happy with the decision, at least 1 wk in.
1) So, I've always thought it was more fun for it to be a surprise before the actual birth--both the sex and the name. You get that iconic "It's a....!" moment at the birth. So, primarily, I just went back to my gut feeling, especially as DH expressed no strong preference.
2) I really prefer more neutral stuff, so I'd rather get gifts of greens, yellows, etc than the really frilly or sporty stuff. I also want things that can be used for future potential siblings of the opposite gender, as this is our first, so I imagine we will use some of the essentials for the next kid or two.
3)The point about people getting you the useful registry stuff for showers instead of tons of pink or blue onesies and dresses was somewhat convincing! Also, I'm sure this baby will get gender-specific gifts or handmedowns after birth, too, so I'm not worried about ending up with zero dresses or something.
4) We don't really have a preference, so we will be excited about whichever comes out. As DH said after the u/s: "I'm just happy the baby has all the normal limbs!" ALSO, I've heard now several times that even if you have a slight preference, the 'gender disappointment' melts away quicker when you have a precious baby in your arms rather than the unseen in-utero baby.
5) I would NEVER be able to find out and keep it a secret from other people, especially family. I'm just not a good secret-keeper about something positive and happy, which it would be either way. I think it would also be harder to keep our name choices secret--when you don't know the gender for sure, you can always just say "oh we have a few boy and girl names picked, but we have to see which it is first!"
6) Where we are living, u/s technology is NOT as fancy as in some places. No 3D, for sure. So it's not as easy to tell, and I have heard multiple stories of women here being told one thing and finding out it was wrong after the baby came out! (Yes, even when they were told it's a boy and it turns out to be a girl.) And that, while only a small possibility, sounded SOO much worse to risk that than just to wait and see! (Plus, we only want to do the one u/s unless there's serious reasons for more, so we wouldn't necessarily have a chance to confirm.)
We did almost feel like our curiosity could get the better of us, but it only took that one moment of willpower to tell the tech "please don't tell us the sex." Also, DH was watching the entire time, but never got a view clear enough that he could tell--seriously, these are not the most advanced u/sds--but I wouldn't have been devasted if he had accidentally seen or figured it out.