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Thread: Namebullies?

  1. #11
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
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    921
    Honestly, while I do run into the occasional "cringe-worthy" comment, I really don't find a lot of overly rude remarks on NB. It's generally a very tame, supportive atmosphere IMO. It could be that I've been spending too much time on the BBC boards... Talk about ridiculous drama!
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  2. #13
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Posts
    1,499
    I hear what you're saying, but this topic gets brought up every once in a great while. I'm not saying that to dismiss your feelings, but to assure you that the majority of users are trying to be helpful and the others will come and go in waves. You can drive yourself batty trying to get everyone here on the same page.

    When I see an unhelpful reply, I just consider it another bump that my thread received up to the top of the boards, haha.

    ETA: I think we're talking about all different kinds of things here: being blunt, being rude, sugarcoating, being vague or unhelpful, being honest, being critical or "negative." All very different motivations and not interchangeable. For example, I appreciate a blunt, visceral reaction every once in a while, but not a rude one.
    Last edited by r_j; July 17th, 2013 at 01:49 PM.
    Mom to baby Leo

  3. #15
    Join Date
    May 2012
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    Quote Originally Posted by catloverd View Post
    I think it really depends on the name in topic and the purpose of the thread. If someone is asking for "honest" or in some cases I see "brutally honest" threads, then I see nothing wrong with people saying "It's terrible, I don't like it, don't do it, etc..."

    I also think the "No. Just, no. That's ridiculous." can be a justifiable response if the name is something like Princess Peanutbutter or Waffles Nevaeh. However, it probably would be a bit nicer to add an explanation as to why it's ridiculous, although that can be hard just looking at the two names I made up.
    A lot of this

    I know I've occasionally responded with a "No, no, no. Please no." But it's usually in response to a thread where everyone is so excited about how wonderful a name is and I feel the need to be a voice of reason. I'd never say that to a name like Victoria or even something like Jasmine or Kaitlyn or Harper. But if everyone in a thread is telling the OP that it's a fabulous idea to call her daughter Elliot or Kyndoll, I'm gonna say something. Probably more strongly because of all the previous positive feedback.

    Most of the time with those type, it's pretty obvious the reason for the negative opinion. I would feel like I was patronizing the person if I said, "You shouldn't name your daughter Elliot because it's a boy's name. I know it's on a TV show, but just because they do something on TV doesn't mean you should do it to."

    But by the same token, if I love a name and everyone in the thread is dissing it, I'm also more vocal in my love and approval!

    I'm usually much more democratic if I'm the 1st poster in a thread. And I don't rub it in if 10 other people have already shown disapproval.

    But overall, I think most people take the opinions given with a grain of salt. And if they don't, they should.
    Olivia/Livia/Livy/Liv : Thessaly/Darah/Bethel : Noelle/Eve
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  4. #17
    Join Date
    May 2013
    Posts
    333
    Quote Originally Posted by ottilie View Post
    I don't find it constructive to comment on people's taste based on my own, I try to put myself in their shoes. If someone likes surnames or boy names on girls, find nice one and suggest instead of bringing up Annabelle or Cordelia.
    Lol! As much as I hate when people do this, it's actually kind of funny if you point it out like that.

    I was actually considering putting out a thread similar to this one. I'm glad some other people agree with me. If you don't like someone's style, than you can say that. That's fine. But please, for Pete's sake, do not recommend Annabelle or Cordelia, or other Nameberry favorites that obviously aren't the poster's taste. I'm sure you can find a name similar in style that doesn't make you barf. (That was sarcasm, btw.)
    Previous account: elrock13

  5. #19
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
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    Australia
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    I agree, constructive criticism should be the name of the game. But sometimes I think you just need to be brutally honest. If someone is asking about naming their child something crazy (by most people's standards), we aren't doing them any favours if we don't provide honest feedback. Sometimes a "No, that's ridiculous" will convince someone not to name their child something terrible, whereas a "That's an interesting name..." might not have the same effect. But I agree with the general arguments put forward by the OP, as well as kalaway's statement that people's opinions should be taken with a pinch of salt.
    Last edited by sarahmezz; July 16th, 2013 at 09:19 PM.
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