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Thread: Am I Normal?

  1. #16
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Posts
    816
    Thank lineska! I really am exited to be a mom. Granted, it was not the perfect timetable. But all anxiety aside, I am happy! Just nervous! But I would NEVER imagine adoption and definitley never in a million years termination. I already love this little guy/gal!!

  2. #18
    Join Date
    Jul 2013
    Location
    New York
    Posts
    650
    @bostonsavvy- I think the best thing to do is stop freaking out and just focus on your future now and prepare for a new life that you and your husband created. Of course it is scary because you are going to be responsible for a human life not like an animal where people surrender them to rescue groups if its too much or they are not financially able to care for them. But asking for the berries opinions you are going to get the truth not fluff added. I have had the same issues with worrying about what people will think because I am 23, not married yet and TTC. But your true friends and family will not judge you. I think people are just as shocked as you but when that little bundle enters the world everyone is going to love him or her and not judge you for being a young parent. I to had a lot of problems with BC which made me really sick and almost numb to the world. And I am allergic to latex and just do not like condoms since they always give UTI's. But in my opinion just grab the bull by the horns and worry about what you need to do to prepare for the bub. You are young and going to have to mature pretty quickly now but people do it and you can too so stop freaking out! Embrace it.
    TTC Baby #1!

  3. #20
    I get a lot of anxiety with pregnancy hormones, even if the baby is planned! My last one I was freaking out even though it was totally intentional! It seems to go away by the 2nd trimester, but return again at the end and just after the baby is born. I'm 4 months post partum now and I feel like it's disappeared again. For me, just realizing that it's not me but the hormones makes a huge difference! Being a mother is awesome. I wouldn't trade it for the world. Good luck!

  4. #22
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Posts
    3,962
    If you lose friends you will make new ones who have more in common with you. I am much older, but most of my pre-baby friendships revolved around activities that I don't do now that I'm a mom. Some of my party girl friends come & visit me still, every once in awhile I join them for a night out, but more often I spend time with & am in touch with my newer mom friends. I guess I just relate to them more at the moment. You can meet new people through stuff like meetup.com or a prenatal class, maybe prenatal yoga, ect. You might be the youngest girl in the class, but be mature and don't be shy. From my mom groups, some of my favorite moms are much older than me. I think that once the baby is here you will get along with other moms that have similar parenting ideas as you, regardless of age.

  5. #24
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Location
    Oregon, USA
    Posts
    1,039
    I can't offer first-hand experience, but I was with my sister during her entire first pregnancy at age 19.

    I saw her lose some friends, but they probably weren't very good ones - I also saw her gain some new, amazing friends that she still has now 7 years later.

    For her it was also a birth control oops (she really doesn't even like kids, except now her own 3 daughters), so even though she thought she might be pregnant, finding out was when all the reality came rushing in. 19 is a time in your life when you've just barely started to find out who you really are, and having a child young will define you in many ways, and they can all be positive if you seize the opportunity! She is a really good Mom and you will be too. Yes it is a lot of responsibility, and yeah, you're going to have to find your own way of parenting.

    I also think it is awesome that your hubby is excited, because having a partner who is 100% in it with you makes all the difference. Your mom will most likely end up being a huge resource for you as well (my mom was super negative about my sister's 1st pregnancy, I think some moms just worry too much about what their children's lives "should" be like in their minds versus what is actually fulfilling for us - and we'll probably do the same to our kids, right? Haha).

    Anyway, just breathe, focus on staying healthy and treating yourself well, have lots of open and hard conversations with your partner, and I'm sure you'll figure everything out as you go along!

    Best wishes, darling. Hope that helped!
    Baby Sequoia Orion due October 2014!
    Other favorites: Cytheria, Arcadia, Seraphina, Caspian, Gideon

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