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Thread: Young Moms
July 5th, 2013 09:50 PM #41Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jun 2013
I think it's fine if you choose to have kids young. But the reason why its usually so looked down upon, is because most young people just coming out of high school don't make enough money to really financially support a baby.
July 5th, 2013 10:29 PM #43
I honestly think a woman should have the freedom to do as she pleases...whether it makes her happy to just be a wife and mother, or if it makes her happy to have a career, or if it makes her happy to balance all three. No one shoe fits all, it's about personal happiness.
I come from a very rural area where most girls are wives and mothers by 20 or single mothers (government/grandparent supported). Most of the girls I went to high school with did not dream of going to college, some of them were the first high school graduates in their families. In my younger days, before I moved away, I thought most of them were very foolish for not wanting more. I would guess that I am one of less than half dozen women from that graduation class that hasn't had a baby yet.
Jump ahead a few more years, I take a women's history class that stresses that a woman cannot be happy if she is only a wife and mother. She'll need "mommy's lil helper" all the time. And while that is/was the case for some women, for some women, they are/were totally happy being mothers and wives. I think some of the history books I read were very biased.
Some women would be and are miserable away from their children, just as some women are miserable in the caregiver role. I think it's about personality and partly how and where the woman was raised.
So, now that I'm older, I think you should do what makes you happy, as long as you think wisely and prepare for the future, responsibly. If a woman doesn't go to college (it's not for everyone), I think she should definitely get some work experience before having a child, in case she needed to work again. The divorce rate is 50/50, spouses do pass away unexpectedly (my dad did), and spouses do get laid off from work.
Be a happy woman, but also be a prepared woman with backup plans in mind.
July 5th, 2013 10:44 PM #45Senior Member
- Join Date
- Nov 2011
Cosmo articles. The "housewives" I am friends with are making their own yogurt, baking vegan, gluten-free or paleo cupcakes, building chicken coops...and they live in Brooklyn, not down on the ranch! They blog, they start home-based businesses, they are often much happier than my friends who spend their time trapped under the glass ceiling, paying their daycare providers $100 for every minute late they are to pick up their children...
I think that feminism is about being where you want to be & finding what fulfills you personally.
July 5th, 2013 11:22 PM #47
July 6th, 2013 12:43 AM #49Junior Member
- Join Date
- Jul 2013
I don't think your physical age has much to do with it. I think that if you are emotionally and psychologically ready to have kids and want that life, then more power to you! I am a big time feminist, but I really believe that in someways, that whole movement has in some ways hurt us by being somewhat less approving and accepting of women who find happiness in being a mom and not necessarily also wanting a career. If being a mom is what makes you the best version of yourself, and you know you want to be a mom, then your age isn't always such a big deal.
Last edited by moosey; July 6th, 2013 at 12:45 AM.