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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    829

    Mixed emotions re names

    My husband's cousin had a baby a couple days ago and just announced the name: Tessa Morgan LN. I absolutely love it--Tessa. It was one of our top choices for our DD when she was born but we used a different name in the end. (Morgan is the cousin's maiden name--nice touch.) Anyway, I'm not upset or anything; I know we could still use it if we had another girl (not even sure if we'll have another!). I just found myself with a tiny bit of sadness that she used it, a little bit of name-jealousy bc I think it's perfect. Of course, I'm thrilled for her. Probably part of the feelings come from not even being sure if we'll have a third baby; sometimes I want another (ok, most of the time!), other times I think we can't afford another, etc.

    Anyone else ever had these mixed feelings for a friend/family member over a name? I'm not talking about name-stealing, really; no one even knew Tessa was a top name for us. Just coincidental settling on a name you really loved and kind of cherished. I'm pretty sure I'm not alone here!!
    Mom to Seth Andrew and Madeline Frances

    Other current favorites (girls): Rosemary, Elizabeth, Tessa, Susanna, Katherine; (boys): Noel, Spencer, Patrick, Rory, Alexander

  2. #3
    Yep - Nora / Norah. Love it, and not only is it getting more popular in general, but 2 friends and 1 relative have used it in the last year. Plus an Eleanor. Very sad. Probably would have been our top pick actually had I gotten pregnant sooner.

  3. #5
    Join Date
    May 2013
    Location
    Munchkinland
    Posts
    1,618
    I've definitely felt that way. My sister used our top boy name choice (which we have had picked out since before we were married) for her second son's middle name. She didn't know, though, as we never discussed it with anyone. We're still going to use it if we ever have a boy, since it's only his middle name. I worry it might upset my sister if we do, but that name has a lot of significance to my husband and me. My husband said if she makes a fuss about it, he'll tell her it's a family name and we have to use it for traditions sake.

    My best friend also decided to name her daughter something that rhymes with my daughter's name (my daughter was 6 months old when hers was born). She calls her by a nickname that sounds almost exactly like my daughter's name (replaces the M sound with the N sound). It doesn't really bother me that much, but it's kind of weird. I was a little taken aback when she announced the name, though, because she told everyone at her baby shower that they were deciding between two completely different names (one of which was gorgeous and I would use it myself someday if I didn't already have a family member with that name). She had also told me previously that her boyfriend didn't really care for the name she ultimately chose. I actually thought they must have broken up after she announced the name because she had said the baby was going to have a hyphenated last name, but she ended up with just her mom's. The whole situation was just weird. She really should have kept it to herself until the baby was born because a lot of people were confused and disappointed.

  4. #7
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    829
    I knew some berries would be able to relate and make me feel a little better. BTW, she has an older daughter named Lila Justine (her DH is Justin). I think Lila Justine and Tessa Morgan go together so nicely.
    Last edited by saraallison; June 20th, 2013 at 08:50 PM.
    Mom to Seth Andrew and Madeline Frances

    Other current favorites (girls): Rosemary, Elizabeth, Tessa, Susanna, Katherine; (boys): Noel, Spencer, Patrick, Rory, Alexander

  5. #9
    Yes.. I often get a mixed pang of happiness/sadness when I hear of someone using a name from my long (and mostly unofficial) list!

    My cousin used our Grandmothers name (jean) for her daughters middle, and shortly after my sister in law used my husbands Granny's name (June) for their daughter. Even though this was way before we were even thinking about kids, I remember feeling a bit jealous that they'd gotten in first!

    Recently a girl in town chose Zanna for her daughter which I have always loved and never expected to hear on real life baby when my husband vetoed it. So wasn't even on official list but in someways makes it harder to hear used on another baby.. But rationally thinking I'm glad somebody got to use it as it was never going to be me

    When my friend called her daughter Polly I felt happy she'd chosen such a sweet name, but also some degree of name envy.. Even though I probably never would have ever used that name as it doesn't fit with my children's names anyway.. But still that pang.. Anyhow, it's a gorgeous name for a gorgeous girl and I now love that I get to hear and say the name on regular basis, even if not for my own child

    Another close friend chose Levi for their son, forever crossing it off our list.. I felt quite sad and had (have!) definite name jealousy as this was one we would have used and was actually pregnant with my son at the time. Another friend with great taste

    When a friend of a friend named their boy Arlo I felt a bit sad/happy. I love that name. Then another acquaintance used it just a few months later, closely followed by a celebrity using it for their daughter.. I felt mostly sad as three occurrences in a short space was enough to cross it off the list for me. But part of me is still happy that such a cool name is becoming more popular.

    I think name envy is pretty common when you have similar taste to your friends/family! Obviously there is a limit to the number if children we can have/name ourselves but it can be hard 'letting go' of the ones that have a special place in our hearts

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