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Thread: Taking your husbands name?
June 9th, 2013 11:09 AM #36Senior Member
- Join Date
- May 2012
I would most likely change mine if I ever got married. To be perfectly honest my last name just doesn't mean all that much to me, I don't feel a strong sense of identity to it like I do my first and middle names and it's not particularly wonderful (and goes hand in hand with jokes alluding to a particular activity, which I'm not going to say because it is very obvious then what my surname is, which get old very quickly.)
I quite like the idea of hyphenating two names together though but having my surname passed on to my children matters very little to me. I have a brother and a couple of male cousins who can carry the name on if they so choose.
In an ideal world I would marry a man with a beautiful last name that goes perfectly with all of my favourite names (which he would love, of course), preferably one that was in the middle of the alphabet so any children of mine wouldn't be sat at the front for classes and exams, which is something that always annoyed me.[FONT=System][CENTER][SIZE=2]Under serious construction
June 9th, 2013 11:21 AM #38Member
- Join Date
- May 2013
I kept mine. My father was terminal with cancer during the time of our wedding. I was having a really hard time. My husband was very understanding about it. My sister-in-law also kept her married name for the same reason. At my wedding, she came up to be and said " I hear I started a trend" lol. It was pretty funny. I fully was going to hyphen my name. But since all the stuff that was happening with my father. I just couldn't. I am thankful that my husband is so understanding.
June 9th, 2013 01:38 PM #40Senior Member
- Join Date
- Apr 2013
I kept my last name. In many ways, I agree with most of what the other posters who kept their names said--My name is part of my identity (I was adopted by my father when I was little, it was a big deal to me at the time), much of my professional work was completed under my maiden name, and I like my last name better than his.
He was actually the one who suggested I keep it. Growing up, his mom's best friend kept her last name and he played with her kids--it's something that he accepts as completely normal.
We were the first to get married in a group of his childhood friends that still regularly hang out--all of the friends have since gotten married, and all of the women (originally in the group and marrying in) kept their last names. We had a conversation about it once, and the reasons were pretty similar to what has already been said.
I don't look down on those who take their partner's names, but I will admit to being surprised at certain women I know who did take a new name. When we have kids, they will be mylastname-hislastname (mine comes first alphabetically).Mommy to one amazing Allegra Valentine, born May 2014.
Current name crushes: Daphne, Allegra, Rosalie, Minerva, Alistair, Jules, Ellington, Caspar
June 9th, 2013 03:29 PM #42
I am going to change mine. First of all it's tradition and I'm not one for breaking a tradition and second of all I hate my last name, it has a silent letter which everyone pronounces and I'm tired of correcting people. I also don't want my children to go through the same thing. I just wish I could have had a surname like Fletcher or Conway, I would have even settled with Jones or Smith to be honest.
June 9th, 2013 05:17 PM #44Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jan 2011
I have never heard of changing your last name on your birth certificate when you get married. That definitely isn't how it is done in America, at least. When I did it, I brought my marriage license to the social security administration office, then took the new SSA card to get a new drivers license. Then when we planned our next trip abroad, I got a new passport w. my new last name. But my birth certificate still has my maiden name. I am positive about this b.c we had to order copies from the state when we did our homestudy.