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Thread: Taking your husbands name?
June 9th, 2013 12:28 AM #26
I've already replied to a couple of similar threads, but I'll respond again!
I got married last August and I haven't changed my name. My reasons have absolutely nothing to do with aesthetics - my surname is a fine name and so is my husband's. I felt like (and I'm fully aware not everybody feels this way and I'm not having a go at those who choose to change their names) by changing my name, a part of me was being absorbed into my husband, as though I was losing part of my individuality. I know you DO lose part of your individuality by marrying, but my name is a key part of my identity. I thought about my decision for a long time because my husband wanted (and still wants) me to change my name. We don't have children yet, but when we do they will have his surname. I occasionally use my husband's surname (for example, my name on Facebook is Sarah Maidenname Marriedname and when I send cards to people I put our name on the return address as J & S Marriedname. However, my name is not legally changed in any way and still appears as my maiden name on driver's licence, bank account, medicare, etc.TTC #1
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June 9th, 2013 12:30 AM #28
June 9th, 2013 01:47 AM #30
I don't think I would change my name, but I may or may not get married. Like @lexikj, my surname is rare and seemingly easy, but people have a dickens of a time trying to pronounce it. And as my fathers side of the family is, for lack of a better word, dying out, I've become rather attached to it. It's become part of my identity, and I would feel like I was losing a part of me. I would be willing to hyphenate my name with his (it'd be a bonus if he chose to do it as well), or have our children hyphenate too. But I'm not comfortable with being Mrs. John Smith.-Athena
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June 9th, 2013 09:00 AM #32
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June 9th, 2013 09:12 AM #34
I'm getting married and I will be changing my last name. I had mixed feelings about it but it means a lot to him and honestly, I'm not any less of a part of my family with a different last name. I won't stop being me and what I've accomplished to this point with my maiden name won't stop being mine if I change my last name.
It's a personal preference thing. I know women who have and haven't. No judgement either way. It's wonderful to live in a world where we have the choice now.TTC #1
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