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  1. #21
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    Location
    Los Angeles
    Posts
    164
    With my first pregnancy it took a while for me and the husband to find a name we could both really get behind. After we did, we told everyone who asked that our little dude would be named Holden; but until we did, we didn't really seek outside consultation.

    This time around, we're having another boy, and it's been a challenge to come up with something that 1) we like the sound of 2) is significant in some way beyond aesthetics 3) sounds decent with our hard-to-fit last name and 4) fits somehow with big bro's name. In my desperation, I've tossed some ideas about with my family and some friends, and what I've found is that some people are terrible at this kind of thing and others are not. My wonderful friend Leslie, for example, was constructive and positive, and helped me talk through my anxieties, while another dear lifelong (albeit tactless) friend Manila said, "No. You can't," when I shared with her the name that, in my heart, feels most right. I will not be consulting her again.

    If you know your friends and family members, you can probably figure out which ones of them will be helpful and which will only add to your turmoil. So my advice would be to choose carefully

  2. #23
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Posts
    16
    It's really up to the parents whether they want to share or not, but I believe that what people say about a name can really influence the parents decision. Because of that I would suggest people don't share their choices with anyone but their partner, or someone else they can trust.

    I'm lucky enough that most of my family (extended included) aren't the types that would shoot down a name just because they don't like it. They'll discuss names and give input but unless it's completely absurd, they're gonna back you up with whatever name you choose. I've had family members throw out hundreds of names for everyone to judge, and I've had some not say a word about names. They don't really pry either, so that's awesome.

    The people I'd have to worry about are my friends. They are very vocal about name choices and most tend to love the trendy names, while I tend to like more traditional or "older" names. I'm not even pregnant and I've already had a friend say to me "You like the name VIOLET? That's such a victorian era stripper name!" So when I do actually end up pregnant I think the only 2 people I'll discuss names with are my husband and my mom.

  3. #25
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Posts
    774
    This is a topic very near and dear to my heart. We shared Sebastian's name before he was born and got very negative feedback, after that, never again. Helps that we didn't know the gender with 2 of the kids ahead of time, but even so, didn't share what we were considering. I like keeping something a surprise especially if the gender is known plus its easier to "see what baby looks like" when choosing a name as grandma, friends, etc doesn't get stuck on a name since it seems like "these days' everyone picks out a name for baby before he/she is born.
    Married to my love since August 2001
    --—————————————
    My lovely bunch of coconuts;
    Sebastian Elihu (7/02)
    Bronwen Eliza (2/04)
    Linus Ezra Graham (9/06)
    Violet Leona (1/09) and
    Wolfgang Levi (3/13)
    Always missing our Felix Emmanuel (10/10-10/10)

  4. #27
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Location
    South Australia
    Posts
    915
    Our eldest is named after my Grandma. We chose to tell everyone the name we had chosen because we didn't want to announce the name and have everyone emotional because we had named her after their late wife, mum, etc. We wanted them to adjust to it ahead of time. We never had any negative comments about her name.

    With our second I was selective about who I discussed names with, my husband, mum and sisters mainly. I also shared some names I liked but weren't at the top of our list. I think everyone was surprised when we announce her name, even us since we changed our minds at the last minute!

    This time I have talked names with my husband, mum and sisters again. They are always supportive, constructive and helpful. Plus they can keep a secret! We have decided not to make our final choice until we meet out little bundle though.
    The 3 Princesses in my life...

    Elizabeth Hope
    Annabelle Cadence
    Madeleine Pearl

  5. #29
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Posts
    382
    I told my family our name choices for all three of my children. I was pregnant with my first at the same time as my sister, so using family names I felt that it should be known. Also, my sister-in-law asked me if I minded her use of names because my children's names were similar. I feel family is an important part of the inclusion.
    ~Jackie Jordan~ a.k.a. ~ J.J.~

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