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June 8th, 2013 02:10 PM #16
We didn't share any names and don't plan to this time around either. I was/am too worried that they'll say something to put me off the name. They didnt say anything horrible about our daughters name when we announced it (after she was born), but I have no doubt that they would have said something nasty if we mentioned it before her birth and probably put me off using it.Senia Hero: 21/03/11
Apolline Ever: 05/09/13
June 9th, 2013 12:44 PM #18Member
- Join Date
- May 2013
Oh my gosh, this has been on my mind lately. It seems like everyone asks me what names we like. The things that come out of people's mouth when you are are all hormonal can be so hurtful or at least I tend to take it that way. This happened to me at a friend's BBQ recently and EVERYONE was so opinionated, I seriously welled up with tears and had to walk away before I started crying! I tend to be an emotional person anyway, and definitely even more so when I am pregnant. If I was holding the baby in my arms and said the very same name(s), I know they would have more tact, why is it different when the baby is inside of you? I had to remind myself of the names they chose for their children (top 10's and of course the "Jaidyn" as well) and also remind myself I got these same reactions when I was pregnant with the first 3, yet after most people meet my kids and hear their unique names, they love them and I get compliments all the time.
I also agree that when you already know the gender and some people know the date, because of c-sections and inductions, what's left? A little surprise is nice. Plus, I always felt I needed to really meet that little baby before finally settling on a name. I like the pp suggestions of "What do you like?", that's sure to keep most people at bay since they likely just want to blab about what they like, not really having any interest in what you like. My mom and best-friend are the only exception to that rule.Momma to:
Expecting another boy October 8, 2013
June 9th, 2013 01:18 PM #20
I don't have children and I'm not pregnant, but I've thought about this quite a bit. It's the norm in my circle of family and friends to share the name after the baby is born. I like this because 1) the name is the final "surprise" and 2) people are far less likely to make rude comments about the name choice after it's official. I definitely won't be sharing my children's names before they're born. I have considered sharing the initials with close family and friends to see if they can puzzle it out before the big day though.Emily • Nineteen • United States
♂ | Samuel ◊ Edward ◊ George ◊ Arthur ◊ Ezra ◊ Gideon ◊ James ◊ Alexander ◊ Theodore ◊ Joseph
♀ | Jane ◊ Anne ◊ Helen ◊ Caroline ◊ Phoebe ◊ Georgia ◊ Gwen ◊ Sylvie ◊ Cordelia ◊ Arya
June 9th, 2013 08:35 PM #22
This kind of is a "duh" comment, but I think it's up to the parents, and I dont judge anyone on their choice to share vs not share.
In all honesty, I probably won't share the name before the birth because I am indecisive and have a tendency to change my mind at the last second so I don't want to like, have a babyshower and all the cards are addressed with the baby's name, or receive personalized things. I feel like if I wanted to change the name last second, I'd feel guilty about it.
I have zero interest in discussing names with anyone other than my husband, too. That's "our" job, as far as I'm concerned. I'm never going to please everyone with a name choice, and I don't want to give up a name I truly feel is the one because a friend or family member decides to make a joke out of every name I mention (I've seen it happen, and I'm not putting myself in that position).
For some people, sharing the name and having open discussions about potential picks work great, and I see the advantages, but it's not what I want to do in the future.Lucia
travel. teach. learn.
20-something, name aficionada
Sela Ivy, Vivian Lilac and Bastian Ivor, Joscelin Amos
June 9th, 2013 10:08 PM #24
I think it depends on what's most important to you, keeping a secret and/or having your parents weigh in.
If your mom can't/won't keep the name secret then I think you have to weight importance and figure out
if her input or the secrecy is more important to you.
I personally can't keep a secret from my SO or my mother.
I turn into a little kid going "I have a secret. Can I tell you?" it's quiet ridiculous.
So I might pretend to not tell my mom but in reality that is never going to happen. lol....if my husbands has no vote, then....
Endora & Lorelei / Dexter & Gideon
...we are newlyweds and not trying...yet...