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  1. #11
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    Newport, RI
    Posts
    151
    I honestly didn't think I preferred a girl when I got pregnant. I was good either way. It wasn't until the ultrasound when I found out it was a boy that I really got upset. I'm not even for certain why. I don't despise sports or anything (though I do despise the overabundance of sports decor and clothing in the boy's sections). Maybe it's fear of the unknown or maybe it's because I've had a very problematic pregnancy (diagnosed with a serious condition in April). Maybe it's just the stress of the health issues and this is just the easiest thing to be upset about? I don't really know. All I do know is that I'm not into it. But I have to make myself be somehow to get things accomplished.
    Mom to:

    Gretchen Sofia
    Cordelia Violet

    due July 2013

  2. #13
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Posts
    915
    Shame on the shamers. Gender disappointment seems to be horribly misunderstood, and I can't believe my eyes whenever people chide parents who are going through it. Of COURSE the healthy babe is the most important thing, but there is often no way to anticipate or prepare for something like gender disappointment.

    That said, I do agree with Ottilie that you may well be digging yourself into a hole (good way of putting it!). There are wonderful things about boys, and you are very lucky to have two lovely girls already - won't it be fun to mix things up a bit? Even though you're struggling now, you WILL adore him once he's here, and five years from now you'll be able to look back and chuckle at yourself for wishing he'd been a girl. As far as decorating and naming goes, no everything doesn't have to be cars and footballs and Jack and Butch. I personally like animals for both boys and girls, not ducks and pigs but more along the lines of woodland creatures or safari animals. I also love a sky/stars theme, planets and such. You may be frozen looking at decor items just wishing for Pink, and not allowing yourself to see some of the really FUN gender neutral stuff! I mean, just check out these cute cute cute animal bedding designs:

    http://www.landofnod.com/baby-crib-b...bedding/f11946
    http://www.landofnod.com/baby-crib-b...-bedding/f9960
    http://www.landofnod.com/all-creatur...-bedding/f4157
    http://www.potterybarnkids.com/produ...rsery-bedding&

    And these cute little boy and gender-neutral onesies:

    http://www.gap.com/browse/product.do...0030&cid=95686
    http://www.gap.com/browse/product.do...&pid=913406002
    http://www.gap.com/browse/product.do...&pid=443606012
    http://ow.ly/lKEGG
    http://ow.ly/lKEDR

    If you search Pinterest for "boy nursery" and "baby boy onesie," you'll actually see very very little on the themes or sports and cars, and tons of CUTE stuff.

    I tend to agree that the wealth of feminine names out there is more compelling, but that doesn't mean that there aren't some absolute gems to choose from for boys. Your girls are a bit vintage, slightly unusual but accessible and familiar. I'm not good at brainstorming, so I just always turn to Nymbler, which gave me:

    Miles
    Dexter
    Frederick
    Emile
    Emmett
    Porter
    Duncan
    Cato
    Liam
    Horatio
    Sebastian
    Gustave
    Asa
    Simon
    and many more...


    The best favor you can do yourself is to stop indulging your depression, and that's ALWAYS true whether it's over gender disappointment, career frustration, an ended relationship... the more you argue against those trying to help you turn the corner, the more you cement yourself in your little depression hole. Nothing will change the fact that this child is a boy, and how sad would it be to look back on your pregnancy and remember how much time you wasted being bummed out about your child instead of celebrating and being excited for his arrival? What do you want your answer to be if he asks you someday if you were excited when you found out he would be a boy?
    Last edited by yellow; June 5th, 2013 at 07:37 PM.

  3. #15
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    Posts
    212
    I would suggest looking at things like disney beddings and different characters from disney that you like! I think that Babies R Us has a monsters inc bedding set out now, I'm not positive if it's from Babies R Us or not, so don't hold me against that. Think about all of the cool things you can do with a little boy. There's so many movies about cars and trucks and monster trucks. Maybe you'll be able to take him to a monster truck show, maybe he will be the "man" and kill the spiders and bugs in your house when you and your daughters are afraid of them! Bike rides, sports, there's lots of fun things to do with little boys.
    Good luck, this will pass and just know you are not the only one!
    Strive not to be a success, but rather of value
    ~Albert Einstein~

  4. #17
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    Newport, RI
    Posts
    151
    I realize it will past, truly I do. I'm just afraid that when it does, I'll have nothing ready for him, not a name, not a nursery. Apparently, almost all gender disappointment passes when the baby is born, so I feel pretty good about it passing then.
    Mom to:

    Gretchen Sofia
    Cordelia Violet

    due July 2013

  5. #19
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Posts
    915
    Quote Originally Posted by wahpro View Post
    I realize it will past, truly I do. I'm just afraid that when it does, I'll have nothing ready for him, not a name, not a nursery. Apparently, almost all gender disappointment passes when the baby is born, so I feel pretty good about it passing then.
    Like I said, the best way to get out of the funk is to stop indulging it. Start today. React to the suggestions here, at the very least, because I'm betting that you're reading names and looking at links and thinking "they just don't understand how I feel!"
    Allowing yourself to actually respond to others' suggestions would be a good first step, because you'll be looking at them in a realistic way rather than just dismissing them.

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