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Thread: My name does not fit
May 24th, 2013 04:59 PM #1
My name does not fit
My nameberry name, a top guilty pleasure I use on here, is Mehri.
My real name doesn't fit. It is a lovely name, but it feels wrong. The second part isn't a good nickname IMO, and the first part gives me Madi. Maddee, Maddie, Maddy, Madsy, Midi. I even tried Madge. All the misspellings and variations I know, but it still isn't right for me.
But not so long ago, I was reading a book, and a character's name was Frankie. I thought nothing of it, but then I was thinking of the book a few days ago, and it hit me. Frankie is the perfect name for me.
After some careful thought, and lots of Nameberry searching, I found the name Becca. Frankie and Becca are both names which work well with my possible new last name (I'm considering changing it to St. Lawrence), and Francesca and Rebecca are both lovely names. Neither are on my family tree, as far as I know, but they seem so perfect.
To me, Frankie is slightly rebellious and daredevil but can also be kind and friendly. The name seems to be mine already.
Becca sounds tough but cool, the kind of name a sassy lawyer might wear, although the words 'sassy' and 'lawyer' should not be next to each other in a sentence. Either name would be an improvement on the current one.
Mehri is my favorite guilty pleasure name, but I could never use it. It isn't from my culture, and although I love it on here, it would not work in the real world.
Genevieve is my favorite name, which I also considered, but I couldn't see myself as a Genevieve. To me, Genevieve is a pretty, quiet, intellligent girl with soft brown hair and big puppy dog eyes. I cannot see a grown Genevieve, and it wouldn't work for all of these reasons.
However, I think Becca or Frankie (Rebecca or Francesca on legal papers and at work) could be women. Rebecca St. Lawrence. Becca St. Lawrence. Francesca St. Lawrence. Frankie St. Lawrence. They just sound like me.
So, in your opinion, would Becca or Frankie be a better name?
And can you please, please share your story if you have changed a first or last name? The change may not follow through, and I may just continue as a Madi or use my full name.
Every member of Nameberry is a wonderful person, and if it does work out, I'm sure I will find support here.
(maybe a Becca or Frankie soon)~Mehri
May 24th, 2013 05:16 PM #3
I prefer Francesca St Lawrence (nn Frankie) to Rebecca St Lawrence. I agree that Frankie is "slightly rebellious and daredevil but can also be kind and friendly" as you stated in your post. I can envision a Rebecca/Becca as "kind and friendly" but the phrase "rebellious daredevil" wouldn't even cross my mind when I think about a Rebecca. Every Rebecca I've known as been sweet and perky (think Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm). Good luck in your new name search.All the best,
May 24th, 2013 06:18 PM #5
Aww, sweetie, I feel for you. I grew up hating my name, too. I didn't think it was me, I hated that it was so generic and popular (oddly, I remember liking that my name was popular, too, but I remember hating it, too? I had very strange thoughts as a little kid, haha!) and that my MN--Marie--was so filler (and I hated the connection to Marie Antoinette!). I had promised my family since I was little (ever since I knew people could change their names!) that I would, and then I fell in love with my name. ugh, it was so disappointing! I was so excited about going through, looking for the perfect name for me, and then one day, I just saw the name Ashley, and I was like, "Wow, that's a really nice name." And then I was like, "Wow, that's my name." lol. And then I was like, "Wow, Ashley really fits me." So I was like, well, forget that. :/ I still have some issues with my name--I hate that it's unisex (it's my uncle's MN, and his brother's FN), and I feel like that's held back my femininity. I've grown up loving to wear dresses (so much so that other kids in my class thought I was weird for wearing dresses every day. Oh, well, haha), still do, I'm not a girly-girl, but I'm not a tomboy at all, either. I feel like I would be much more girly/feminine if my mind wasn't freaked out by my psyche because I share a name with my uncle. :/ That, and Ashley... well, it's a nice name, but I feel like I want to reinvent myself sometimes. Like Ashley, how boring. Thousands of girls were named Ashley. I want to be something interesting and glamorous and fun! Not Ashley. haha. But everything I could use as a nn doesn't really suit me at all. For those reasons, I reconsidered changing my name about a year ago, and had a top four I thought was quite close to suiting me (Eleanor, Lillian, Annabel, and Hannah), but ultimately I decided against it. I'm Ashley, and I don't need something flashy or frilly to make me more fun, feminine, or interesting. Besides, I'm sort of a boring person, haha, so Ashley suits me pretty well.
Hopefully you can find something that suits you and you're happy with. A lot of people will grow into their name, to grow to like it, like I did, and a lot of people still hate their name but won't go about changing it. There are a lot of people who post about changing their name, but I've never seen a ton of people who go through with it and have actually done it. Maybe it just takes a long time to decide what to use, and they never really post that they've done it, and they're now _____ or whatever. But I do know a lot of people get a lot of flack for considering changing their name. My sister threatened to never talk to me again if I used a pseudonym if I ever got published (nevermind if I actually changed my name!)--she was joking--I think--but I could still tell that she didn't want me changing my name--to her, I was and always will be Ashley.
May 24th, 2013 06:38 PM #7
I've had my name for enough years now to know that it isn't the one for me. You said you liked wearing dresses- I'm not girly, my style is interesting (really dark jeans, a brown jacket, boot but not uggs, always an unexpected accessory and dangerously styled hair), but my favorite color is still hot pink. Even though this is the case, I really am a tomboy. I think Frankie and Becca could both suit this.
Thank you so much. It was nice to hear that you rediscovered your name, ash.~Mehri
May 24th, 2013 06:41 PM #9