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  1. #1

    Two weeks until due date, and I need advice!

    This is my first baby, and, months ago, my husband and I had narrowed down our possible boy names to Edmund and Gareth. Days before the 20-week ultrasound, DH admitted that he wasn't a huge fan of those names. (I love them.)

    So, I went back to the drawing board. I tried to include more common names on the list--names that I used to love, before I began to really explore the possibilities. I was still on the fence about some of them, but I figured we could talk it out and find some common ground. Here's the list:

    Edmund
    Gareth
    Arthur
    Henry
    Samuel
    Thomas
    Benjamin
    Luke
    Daniel
    Peter

    DH was okay with Henry, Samuel, Benjamin, Luke, and Daniel, but he liked Thomas the best. Thomas is one of the names I used to love, but it had started seeming a little plain to me, so I hadn't really considered it. But I decided I could love it again. So, we chose Thomas as our boy name; a few days later, we found out we were having a boy.

    We told people. I wish we hadn't, but we did. As far as we were concerned, the baby in my belly was named Thomas, and that's that. All our family and friends know him as Thomas.

    But then I started to second-guess the name. I kept silent about it, though, because it felt like the decision was already made. He's already Thomas. When DH and a few family members started referring to him as "Tommy," I questioned it even more. I do love the name Thomas. But Tommy? I wouldn't have chosen Tommy as a name for my son.

    Last week, I gave in and spoke to DH about it. He feels like it's too late to change the name (and, more importantly, he doesn't WANT to change it), but he agreed to stop calling him Tommy.

    I know I could push the issue. If I reeeaaally wanted to, I could change the name. But even a part of me feels like it's too late. And what would I even change it to? My favourites on the list are Edmund, Gareth, and Arthur, but DH just doesn't love those names, and it doesn't seem fair of me to try to pull a trump card.

    I need help! Or maybe I just need reassurance that Thomas is fine.

    His last name will be Russell. Is Thomas Russell a good, solid, traditional name? Or just completely boring?

    tlrd; WDYT of the name Thomas? And is it ever too late to change your mind about a baby's name?

  2. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Posts
    16
    I think Thomas is a good name. Even Edmund or Gareth could turn into Eddie or Gary....

  3. #5
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Location
    NJ
    Posts
    2,790
    I think Thomas is a strong, traditional name. I don't think it's too late to change but I think you are just over analyzing it a bit... Maybe take a few days away from thinking about any of the names and revisit and see how you feel.


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  4. #7
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    1,809
    It's certainly not too late to rethink your name choice. I suggest finding two more names that you and your husband both love, then picking one of the three upon meeting your baby. Maybe he will look like a Thomas when you see him. Maybe he won't. For now you could tell your relatives that you are still considering other options...or you could just not say anything to them and surprise them with, say, a baby Arthur when they are expecting baby Thomas. They'll be so excited to meet that little boy that they probably won't even think twice about the sudden name switch.

  5. #9
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Location
    Colorado
    Posts
    409
    Thomas in full is a very nice name, but you have to accept that he will probably go by Tom and/or Tommy at some point in his life. If you don't like those, change it now before it is written on his birth certificate.

    You could always move Thomas to the middle name spot (so you aren't changing it completely) and choose another name for the first name spot. If family still wants to call him Thomas, they can, but you'll also have your beloved first name.

    Arthur Thomas Russell
    Edmund Thomas Russell
    Henry Thomas Russell
    Benjamin Thomas Russell
    etc

    If it bothers you, do something about it now, or else you may end up regretting/resenting the choice later. You have a right to feel the way you do and you have the right to name your child a name that you love. Talk to your husband again. Good luck
    Last edited by karacavazos; May 23rd, 2013 at 11:15 PM.
    Maximus Alexander (April 2012)
    Audrey Juliet Sophia (August 2014)
    Owner of "The Art of Naming!"

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