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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    55

    Non siblings & Half siblings ... bedroom sharing help please.

    I have a 19 month old DD by a previous partner.
    Been with my new partner, now fiance, for a year and we have just moved in together this past month.
    Found out yesterday we are pregnant. Anywhere between 4-8 weeks as I didn't have a period last month but I have an irregular cycle so god knows lol. Assuming 8 weeks until scan as march period and lack of april period points to that.
    Fiance has two DC, boy and girl aged 5, from previous relationship.

    Up until moving in with me, fiance had been living back with his parents since splitting with ex partner three years ago so his kids only stayed overnight once a fortnight on a campbed and he had them during days.

    Now that we have the space for them (we are living in a 2 bed terrace and my DD is still in with us at the mo.) we have an agreement with their mum that they will have one night overnight with us 3/4 weeks and 3 nights overnight 1/4 weeks.

    With new baby coming my DD is going to have to move rooms as there is just no way we can squeeze two children in our room with us, it is cramped with 1! Is it okay do you think at their ages (by the time baby comes they will be 6 and 2) to have the three of them (2 girls, 1 boy) share a bedroom when his kids come to stay with us? Their room is the bigger room of the house and we would get the older 2 bunkbeds so they will have plenty of place space.

    We can't afford to move to a bigger property, and we do have an insulated attic that would need minimal conversion for future use - but all the kids are too young for that yet!

    If you don't think it's appropriate, do you think we could get away with maybe putting some sort of curtain up to divide 'their' section and Maylea's section?

    I want them to feel like this is their home away from home and am worried that forcing them to share with Maylea might make them feel like they don't have their own space, if that makes sense? I know that at the ages of 6 and 2 I am probably over thinking things but I just want everything to be perfect.

    Any input on similar situations would be much appreciated.
    Maylea Olivia - My Milly Moo - 28/10/2011.
    Surprise Bump! - 20 weeks tomorrow - Due 15/12/2013!

  2. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Posts
    358
    I don't think there anything wrong with having them share, if anything I think it will foster closeness. Especially given that they are all so young I definitely don't think it would be an issue. I think people are much to fixated on children needing their own space, I certainly think that is true in the teen years but not in the toddler/early school years. Good luck to you.

  3. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Posts
    667
    Nothing wrong with having them share. In my eyes, they are siblings, its no more weird than a brother and sister sharing a room.


    Mama to Amelie Clara (2008) & Daisy Madeline (2013).

    Alice Tallulah, Polly Matilda, Rosalie Faye, Lucy Annabel, Maya Lillian, Hazel Kate, Eva Blossom, Juliet Lila, Ivy Camille.
    Charles Joshua "Charlie", Theodore Samuel "Teddy", Elliott Daniel, Noah Zachary, James Oscar, Arthur Philip, Rowan Isaac.





  4. #7
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Location
    Great Lakes
    Posts
    1,480
    Nothing wrong with having them share a room but look in your lease.

    HOWEVER, I know that when I rented in college, my lease said each bedroom could only have a maximum of 2 occupants over the age of 1 (so the baby wouldn't count). I do not remember what they considered an occupant; your fiance's children might not count since it sounds like they're only there four night a month?
    ** The opinions expressed above are not meant to be reflective of Nameberry as a whole but are my opinion and mine alone. **

    Mommy to:
    Henry Nathaniel (3) and Julia Paige (1)

    Current favorites:
    Bennett - Emmett - Felix - Oliver - Owen - Preston - Samuel
    Abigail - Claire - Clara - Hope - Lydia - Maude - Molly

  5. #9
    Join Date
    Apr 2013
    Posts
    491
    I think it's perfectly fine. They may not technically be siblings or step-siblings, but they're children who are being raised in a family together.

    My only concerns would be that it's likely their bedtimes differ at that age, and hopefully putting the older two to bed won't disturb the baby. I'd say by puberty, privacy might be more of a concern, but at their young ages, I wouldn't think twice about them sharing a room past the logistics of bedtime and making sure the older two feel their belongings and space are respected (ie - don't let the 2 yr old get into their stuff, make sure she's supervised, it will be harder to make a bedroom shared with older children 100% toddler-proof). And make sure the older two are mature enough to understand the hazards of bunk beds, as well.

    If you want to let them feel like they have their own space, maybe let them help "decorate", give them each a space or posters or let them choose artwork to hang up, hang their names up on the door, etc.
    Lillian Elizabeth 6.16.13

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