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Thread: Egg Donation
May 19th, 2013 10:48 AM #6Senior Member
- Join Date
- May 2012
Personally, I would not donate eggs. I read a bit about it when I was in high school and it sounded appealing at the time because I thought that the huge amount of money could fund an international adoption which was my dream at the time. But at this stage of my life I have strong personal views against egg donation. I want to personally raise any child that my body has a part in producing (and if tragedy were ever to bar me from raising any offspring I've produced, I would at least know that they would be raised by my husband or relatives). My faith in God is the single most important thing in my life, and although I can't and won't force my children to believe what I believe, I do want to know that they are raised understanding what I believe and why. I also want to raise my children to have character and a moral backbone, and if I were to donate eggs I would have no way of knowing what was instilled in my offspring. I hold myself personally responsible for any life produced by my body, and for that reason I could never in good conscience donate eggs.
The ONLY exception to this would be if one of my three sisters--and they would be the ONLY ones--struggled with infertility and needed donated eggs.
I think I remember reading in high school that egg donation requires injecting yourself daily in the stomach. I guess for a large sum of money that may not sound so bad, but I had to inject myself in the stomach twice a day for a few months following a car accident and it was BAD. I think lots of other factors may have made it more emotionally traumatizing for me than it should have been, such as a brain injury and PTSD and medicine that I was on, but injecting myself in the stomach really traumatized me and after about two months of it I flat-out could not do it anymore and we had to go a different route. Again, if my sisters ever needed donated eggs, I know I could get through that process, but I would not willingly sign up to do it for any other reason.
Last edited by alzora; May 19th, 2013 at 11:25 AM.
May 19th, 2013 11:21 AM #8Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jan 2013
- SD, CA
I can only offer 2nd hand knowledge. I work with a lot of ART patients, and some of the couple use donor eggs. I have only worked a few times with the actual donors. There are only a couple of things I can think of to bring up for you to consider.
If it were me donating, I think one of my biggest concerns would be my drug protocol I'd be given. Clinics and doctors have gotten much better over the past few years, but one of the biggest dangers as a donor is ovarian hyperstimulation. This is when the drug protocol stimulates the ovaries too much, creating an abundance of follicles and fluid in the ovaries. The ovaries become very enlarged. Symptoms range from mild to severe. Severe cases are very rare, but can be life threatening. Most cases are mild and mainly involve discomfort, bloating, and some nausea. The more severe end of the spectrum involves fluid in your abdominal cavity, breathing difficulties, and kidney problems. Ovarian hyperstimulation is most often seen in a typical IVF patient who becomes pregnant during her cycle following the ovarian stimulation and retrieval because the pregnancy hormone hCG compounds the issue. Since you'd be a donor and will not become pregnant, this situation wouldn't pertain to you. However, because you're young, and probably have very responsive ovaries, it is something to consider. A reputable clinic, with skilled RE's should also decrease the risk of this. There are clinics, though, that try to harvest as many eggs as possible, and that's when problems can arise.
The other question: Would this be an anonymous donation? For me, the most difficult part would not be the physical discomfort and pain from the injections into my abdomen or butt, the stimulation of my ovaries, and the retrieval of my eggs. The most difficult part would be to donate my eggs to anonymous couples. I'd be much more comfortable knowing the people who'd be using my eggs to create a family. I would hate to help a couple create a family who had vastly opposite political, religious, spiritual, social, and child-rearing views that I have. I think that would cause me the most distress. No amount of financial compensation could make up for the pain I'd feel not knowing what type of life those children born from my eggs were going to have. If it's anonymous you need to assume that anyone from a same-sex couples to right-wing tea partiers could be using your eggs.
I will say, though, that in my experience, all of the couples that have used egg donors have been very lovely people (from what little I know about their lives). Couples that end up using egg donors have usually exhausted all other options in their long and painful road of infertility. They are usually very passionate about becoming parents, are financially secure, educated, and all about being the very best parents they can possibly be. It is truly a wonderful gift you can offer to a desperate couple. And, you will be financially compensated, sometimes quite generously.
I hope that helps a little bit. Best of luck. I'd be very curious to hear what you decide.Mama to
Desmond Sanders, born 7/2013
and dog son, Lambeau
May 19th, 2013 11:29 AM #10Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jul 2012
- London, England
I'm pretty sure I'm not allowed to donate eggs, BPD and all. But I don't think I would anyway. Don't get me wrong, it seems like a wonderfully generous and selfless thing to do, but I would always wonder if I had a little biological son or daughter out there. A little someone made from me that I would never meet, never know if she/he was happy, had a good family, became a decent person. No, it would haunt me forever. The only exception would be what Alzora said; my sisters. I only have one real sister, but I consider my best friend and my cousin as my sisters as well. If either of those couldn't have one, I'd give an egg, because I know they would get the best possible families in the world.My darling Marian Illyria Aphrodite, March 2013 & Little Bunny (a girl!) due 9th of February 2014
May 19th, 2013 11:37 AM #12
The reason it pays so well is that it is painful and difficult, and it can negatively impact your own future fertility to a quite significant degree.
Being 'permitted' to donate is also basically the genetic Olympics. There are strict height and BMI criteria; appearance criteria (nearly everyone wants Nordic types, though there are occasional requests for Asians); minimal IQ/SAT scores, minimum educational attainment; maximum ages; and your family medical pedigree is carefully combed through. It's as close to eugenics as we get (sperm banks have criteria too, but they're much more inclusive).XY: Antoine Raphael (3.1.2012)
XX: Cassia Viviane Noor (11.30.2013)
May 19th, 2013 12:05 PM #14
If you haven't donated or used an egg donor...
...would you consider donating? Why? or Why not? What would be your personal concerns?
I don't even plan to give birth. Adoption has always been my number one choice. So I could never donate an egg. There are so many children in the world who don't have homes, why do we constantly feel the need to create more rather than give the one's already existing a family? It just never made sense to me and it would go against my morals/beliefs.
It's also a very invasive procedure. It's not like guys who just have to do it in a cup. Definitely not something I would be comfortable with.