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Thread: Educated mothers as SAHM
May 16th, 2013 02:45 PM #31Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jun 2012
You never know what the future will bring. When my mom wanted to re-enter the work force after almost 15 years out of it, having her degree was really useful. While a lot of her friends were finding jobs in retail, she was able to start substitute teaching and get her credential. Despite never wanting to be a teacher when she was younger, she really enjoys it now. I went through college assuming that I would stay home for at least a few years when I had kids, but with the economy and the job market being how it's been lately, it turns out I'm the one who can find a job in a place that we can afford to live on one salary, and my husband's at home with our 9 month old. More education will give you more flexibility, more debt will give you less. Finding the right balance for you can be tricky...but it sounds like you are doing a great job of thinking about these things in advance rather than letting them sneak up on you.
May 16th, 2013 02:46 PM #33Senior Member
- Join Date
- Nov 2011
I am a stay at home mom with a BA...now I don't think of that as especially educated, it is probably the equivalent of a HS diploma back when my grandmother was a SAHM!
I think it depends on what field you are hoping to be in. In most fields you need more than just a degree to stand out. If you graduate right now in 2013 and are looking for a job 2018 with no experience I think that you would have a lot of trouble finding something. If you manage to have a few projects, volunteer in your field (or even better start a group yourself that betters your community & goes along with your future-career!) and otherwise stay active and self-educate about any changes,ect...maybe you will be a better candidate for a job than a new graduate.
I am loving every minute of staying at home, but as an IC for a marketing company I actually do have a current job on my resume. I think it's important that you don't fall off the map... you my future & for my current sanity!
May 16th, 2013 03:48 PM #35
I am of the opinion that education is never wasted. Whatever you learn will impact your personal development and what you bring to your children. I also think it's wise to remember that life can quickly shift your plans. Not to be a downer, but some people never meet the right person, others lose a partner due to death or divorce. There are also many couples that struggle with getting pregnant. You wouldn't want to forgo your education to be a SAHM, only to find yourself working a "temporary" job for way longer than planned while TTC. My own mom got a biochemistry degree, then took several years off to raise me and my brother. Because she had a degree, however, she was able to go back to school part-time when my dad moved out, and to eventually have a satisfying career as a hospital librarian. My family really valued education, so I have two degrees and was able to support myself well while I was single. Now I am married to someone in a highly demanding profession, so I plan on being a SAHM whenever we have children, but may go back to school when they go to kindergarten.
That said, if you know going into college that you may not be in the workforce for a long time, be mindful of your debt load. You don't want to graduate with huge loans if you're not going to be able to pay them off. That's easier said than done since here in Canada our tuition is much lower than in the US. (My cousin's tuition for one year at Boston University could literally cover a four-year degree at my alma mater AND my grad school tuition. And there would be enough left over to take a trip to Hawaii.)Estella ~ Helena ~ Miriam ~ Beatrice ~ Anastasia ~ Ruby ~ Ivy ~ MarillaPaul ~ Wesley ~ Walter ~ Martin ~ Edmund ~ Fraser ~ Alexander
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May 17th, 2013 07:01 AM #37
@blade - I agree. I am halfway through my MBA right now and I have no plans to become a SAHM, although my dream is for me to be making enough money for my husband to stay at home - he would love it! For me thre tricky part is trying to figure out when to get pregnant and have kids so as not to hurt my chances at a good job. I think if I had a baby shortly after graduating it would work out best, but who knows?TTC our first
Sequoia (possible middles: Maximus, Jonathan, Venture, Jupiter)
Cytheria (possible middles: Beatrix, Violet, Zephyr, Dwyn)
May 17th, 2013 12:41 PM #39Senior Member
- Join Date
- Mar 2012
While I am willing to keep an open mind because who knows how I will feel when I become a mum, I'm pretty sure being a SAHM just isn't a viable option for me.
I'm a lawyer and agree with other comments that it would be very difficult to re-enter my profession after a signigicant absence. I'm also the main breadwinner in our family (not that we couldn't survive off my husband's salary as a military pilot if we needed to), and so we would still be materially financially better off having me work even after paying for a nanny/daycare. While I wouldn't see giving up work as a "waste" of my degrees and believe that educated women staying home to raise children will likely result in educated children, I do think that I will crave a balance between mummy time and adult, thinking time in my life - I believe I will crave the intellectual stimulation of work.
Also, and this is personal baggage, after my parents got divorced when I was a child, both of them became financially dependent on their new partners. Even as a kid, I saw how this limited their choices in life, and made them less autonomous and free. While I hope that my husband and I have a 'forever' marriage, I am terrified of being shackled to someone because I do not have the financial resources to stand on my own two feet. So, financial independence is really important to me.
That being said, I deeply admire all SAHMs, regardless of how educated, and do believe it is the one of the hardest, most relentless jobs in the world.November 2007 - Started TTC
April 2012 - 1st IVF Cycle (BFN)
August 2012 - 2nd IVF Cycle (BFN)
March 2013 - 3rd IVF Cycle (BFP!!!)
Antonia ("Annie") Eloise Gray born 9 November 2013