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April 30th, 2013 01:57 PM #11Senior Member
- Join Date
- Apr 2011
Thank you, you obviously said this WAY better than I was able to. I feel like I am one of the youngest mothers here on nameberry, so I admit to getting overly touchy when the subject comes up. >_<
April 30th, 2013 02:09 PM #13
Well said MrsH
In my area, I am 5-10 years younger than most of my mom friends. It isn't really a big deal except sometimes I feel like I don't really have peers since they are in a different life place than I am but ultimately, it is our ability to laugh together, support each other, and so on that makes us friends, more so than our age. I like having friends of all ages so I don't see it as a negative thing at all. I still have very dear friends my age as well.
Jojo, you will make new friends in the next decade too so hopefully you will have a nice assortment of ages and life experiences amongst your friends. I wouldn't feel bad about having a baby at 30 though at all. That was actually originally my plan! But as others have said, age does not necessarily make someone a better parent/ more responsible person.Mama to my dear little bear <3
April 30th, 2013 02:12 PM #15
I can relate. I've moved to a rural area of New Mexico, am 27 and am due any day now (fingers crossed!! ) with my first. I actually had a young lady come up to me in the market, ask me if this was my first baby, and when I replied it was, she said "wow, you're old for just having your first now!" haha it gave me kind of a chuckle. You have to have some humor with these things. The reality is, in this area, I am the "old mom." Most people my age in this community have 2 or 3 kids. However, most of my college friends and family are back in New York (where I grew up) and I'm considered one of the "young ones" having a baby, in a group of ladies who are in their early to mid 30's.
There can be "good" moms and "bad" moms at any age. I personally am SO HAPPY I waited until 27 to have my first, as I'm in a much more stable place, educationally, financially, emotionally, in my marriage, etc. But that was the best choice for me and I've known many moms who are much younger and doing a fantastic job. It's hard to be a woman these days because I think we're expected to make this incredibly hard choice of baby vs education/career. and no matter what choice we make, there are always people who disagree and are offended by our decisions.
I didn't find the OPs comment to be offensive. It seems like she might have touched an existing nerve for those who have been judged in the past, but it seems some of the reactions are a bit strong and the personal attacks are unneeded. My husband and I are ALWAYS the oldest people in the waiting room at the OB, and I too find it sad and disturbing when I see very, very young moms who are clearly overwhelmed with their situations. I remember when I was 18 and all I had to worry about was waking up on time for my morning classes and which outfit to wear to the party that night. I'm sure most of the younger moms are wonderful parents, but having kids is a tremendous responsibility and one I am happy that I am not facing until I'm ready.
OP, try not to stress and live your life in the way that works best for you, because in the end, that's all that matters.
good luck to you =)proud mama to Aniella Juniper 5.10.13
April 30th, 2013 02:12 PM #17
No problem, flick. I like yr blog. :-)
April 30th, 2013 02:22 PM #19Senior Member
- Join Date
- Apr 2011