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March 3rd, 2013 04:41 PM #1Senior Member
- Join Date
- Aug 2011
What is your preferred form of daycare?
Where do you prefer to send your kids while you are at work? an established daycare, an at-home daycare, a nanny, grandparents, or somewhere else entirely? How do you feel about having a career versus being a stay-at-home mom?
I was just pondering this because I am on the other side of it. The last two summers I worked at a day camp, and while it was fun for the kids, no bonds were made in the least. The parents didn't appreciate us like they would at a smaller daycare facility. I ran into a family last night, and they didn't recognize me even though I had six hour days with their children all summer long. I got another job offer for this upcoming summer as a nanny for a family of three children. It is probably less beneficial to me financially, and doesn't look as good on a resume (I'm studying to become an elementary school teacher so the public camp looks good), but it is very temping. I did it for the family for their Christmas break, and they were so kind to me. They treat their nannies like part of the family, and even when I'm not working for them they stay in touch.
Anyways, I got a little off track, but I'm curious how people with children feel about this. Who do you trust with your kids? Who do they prefer to be with? What are your relationships with them?Mia, Lydia, Cora
Corbin, Rocco, Quinn
March 3rd, 2013 05:37 PM #3Senior Member
- Join Date
- Aug 2011
I work at a fairly small daycare, although most of the rooms are full, and I am currently 18 weeks pregnant at this point we do not want to sen our child to daycare at all. Not because of "bad people" but I don't agree with some of the care methods, though they are not harmful to the kids, it is expensive and someone else will be with my kid but distracted with the needs of at least 4 other babies. Most of the parents I have direct contact with love some teachers, dislike others and can be vocal about it, I hear alot of "I could never do this job." Right now we are hoping that a close friend/co-worker starts her own in care daycare, I completely trust her and agree with how she treats children, that or a babysitter but we would only need one for about 4 hours a day since DH and I work opposite shifts.I'm Alix Louise
Wife to Skyler James since 4/28/12
Mommy to Daphne Valora since 8/02/13
When we have another
Boy : Sebastian, Jasper, Edgar
Girls: Sonia, Matilda
March 3rd, 2013 09:57 PM #5Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jan 2013
I went back to work when Amelie was 18 months old. I was only working part-time hours - I started back with my full time schedule but I missed DD too much and we weren't exactly stuck for cash so DH and I agreed I'd go part-time, which was 16 hours a week.
My parents watched her while we worked. They also watch her cousin who is about 1yr older than her so she had someone to play with. They doted on her, took great care of her, with lots of trips and fun activities and I was able to work peacefully knowing she was being well looked after.
Daycare at that age was not an option for us, we wouldn't have been able to afford a really decent one and I'm weary of putting babies into those kinds of facilities when they don't have the ability to fully communicate with me. I was worried something might happen to her and she wouldn't be able to tell me. I know some parents have no choice and I'm certainly not looking down on those parents - This was just something I wanted to avoid if I could.
I was also aware of the great benefits kids get from preschool so even though she was settled at my parents and thriving developmentally, I wanted her to experience preschool too, so we enrolled her in a fabulous one this September. We thought it'd prepare her for school next year, if nothing else. We chose a great facility with a very small child-adult ratio. She loves it there! She has also made loads of new pals who will be attending the same school as her (the preschool is part of a regular school) so the big change won't be as daunting.
I gave up my job when I fell pregnant on #2, so I guess it isn't even necessary for her to go. I just feel she will benefit from it and she only goes for 4 hours a day, 5 days a week, so it isn't as though she's away from me all the time for no good reason.
So basically, my preferred way would be to leave them with family/stay at home myself until they are able to communicate completely, and then preschool.
Amelie Clara (2008) & Daisy Madeline (2013).
Alice Tallulah, Polly Matilda, Rosalie Faye, Lucy Annabel, Maya Lillian, Hazel Kate, Eva Blossom, Juliet Lila, Ivy Camille.
Charles Joshua "Charlie", Theodore Samuel "Teddy", Elliott Daniel, Noah Zachary, James Oscar, Arthur Philip, Rowan Isaac.
March 3rd, 2013 10:07 PM #7
If there is a continuum between career and mommying, with mommying being a 1 and career being 100, I was at about 98 when Antoine was born. I had a 28-d maternity leave and my normal work week is roughly 80-90 hours. Commercial daycares do not accept children under 6 weeks old, nor are they open late/early/weekend/holidays/overnights, etc; as we were shortly moving cities nannies were not interested in a 3-month full-time stint.
My in-laws cared for Antoine for the first three months, with occasional back-up shifts at a very good commerical daycare.
I am in research now, not active clinical duty, and have a predictable 40-hr work week. Antoine is enrolled at a daycare affiliated with my university hospital and it is absolutely wonderful. I can think of no downsides whatsoever. He is stimulated, has a planned curriculum, is cared for by intelligent and loving teachers-- and it's only 2 blocks from my lab, so if I set up an experiment and let it run for a couple of hours, I can walk over and see him.
I do believe that childcare is very much 'you get what you pay for,' and we do pay about $2000/month for it.Blade, MD
XY: Antoine Raphael; Julian Victor
XX: Cassia Viviane Noor
Allaire * Emmanuelle * Honora * Lysandra * Marina * Rosamond * Serena * Sylvie * Thea * Verity / Blaise * Cyprian * Evander * Jules * Laurence * Lucian * Marius * Quentin * Rainier * Silvan
Hayat _ Qamar _ Sahar _ / Altair _ Faraj _ Tariq
March 3rd, 2013 10:28 PM #9
Blade, that is fantastic for the whole family. What a great thing to be that close to him and for him to have such good care.
I nannied my niece the first year of her life. Most of it anyway. I didn't have to be at work til the afternoon so I watched her until her mother got off work. It was great for everyone. We all lived in the same house so it was perfect. We had a blast and bonded like crazy. It's killing me to live in another state. We FavceTime every weekend. Now she is 3 and her parents are split but she goes to a very good day care. They struggle to pay for it. It's not anywhere near $2K but it's a lot for us middle-middle class folks. She's gone there since she was one, and her aunt works there and her cousin goes there. So it's great.
As for my own kids when I have them, I don't know. Necessity will dictate my decision, as it does for most. My preference would be family, definitely. My mom and I both have worked in day cares, the kinds we would be able to afford, and they were... Not nice. I don't judge people who take their kids there. You do what you must. I understand. But having seen them from the other side... I swore I'd sell a kidney before I would put my child in one. Maybe Mom and I just ended up at really bad ones though.Mrs. H.
Trying for our first.
Gabriel . David. Walker. James . Michael
Clementine . Ophelia . Emerald . Marie . Margot
Avatar: Morticia Addams