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  1. #1

    Sibling spacing in larger families

    I am quite interested in sibling spacing and family dynamics, and have done some research into it. However, most research focuses on spacing of just two siblings, occasionally three- I am curious of how many years difference is best in a set of four or more children.

    As there seem to be quite a few people on here with larger families, I am curious to hear about your experiences and thoughts on this. I would be interested in points of view from both parents and the children themselves (those of you who grew up in larger families).

    Also, would you reccomend larger families? If so, what do you think is the best number?

    And finally, to those of you who overthink these things like me, if you could design your future family, how many, what spacing and gender order would you choose? (and names of course if you have picked them out!!)

  2. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Posts
    335
    I have four children, two boys and then twin girls. My oldest son is 14 months older than his brother. My second son is 18 months older than the girls. I think that close spacing in families is best. My oldest son has never really been jealous because he was to young to realise that he wasn't the center of attention any more. He and his brother are very close. Mostly the difficulty with small age gaps that I have found, is keeping the babies safe from the older children because at 14 or 18 months they don't realise that they can harm the baby. They are just curious and will go up to them and slap them not because they want to hurt them but that is the stage of motor development that they are at. I strongly recommend large families for many reasons. For one thing it is a lot of fun! I also believe that it is important to both God and to society to raise as many good children as you can. We think we will end up having somewhere between 7-9 children. I like the close spacing and plan to continue it with out future children.

  3. #5
    We are a mixed family(meaning I have step-children), but we are 9, 6, 4 and 2. The 9, 6 and 2 year olds are my fiance's children, the 4 year old is mine - I like the spacing, personally, but my fiance says he prefers them closer together because they are more in line developmentally with each other. Right now, the 9 and 4 year old are boys and the 4 year old gets frustrated because he can't play with the toys meant for the 9 year old or really do things the other kids can. (like certain games and activities).

  4. #7
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Location
    New England
    Posts
    1,885
    I don't have children, but my brother and I are 5 years apart and I felt like we grew up like two only children. We are very close now, but growing up we were so far apart in everything, that both he and I felt like we missed out on the childhood experience of having a sibling.

    I plan to have mine closer together when the time comes.
    My darling little Bean is a G I R L!
    Making her debut September 2014

  5. #9
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Location
    West Midlands, UK
    Posts
    1,801
    I don't have children yet, in the future I would like a large family 5+ children, I think I would like them quite close together as there is an age gap of three years between me and my sister and we get on very very well and are extremely close, whereas my half-brother who is 10/11 years my senior hasn't had that bond with me. I would like a gap of about two years between my first two, then smaller gaps if possible between the rest until the last, where I would like a gap of about three years between my last but one and final baby. I'd prefer to have boys (I find the names easier!) but really, any healthy baby would be a blessing.
    Current Loves: Tobias Henry and Sebastian Keith

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