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March 22nd, 2014 07:25 AM #1
My mother-in-law hates our name ideas for our second daughter...
During my first pregnancy we learnt pretty quickly to keep all of our name ideas to ourselves, however we had a name sorted for our first once I was like four months and we just kept it to ourselves.
We actually waited until we registered her birth to tell people her name so then people wouldn't judge or try to demean the name, but there was still some raised eyebrows at our choice of name (Cressida).
But my husband has told his mother about what we are thinking of calling our daughter and she came round yesterday and told me to choose a "normal" name. She kept going on about how her two daughters named their daughters decent names (Charlotte and Lily and then Violet and Penelope). I don't think our name choices are that "weird" (Aoife (EE-fa), Bryony, Ramona, Ingrid, Sybil).
I just don't know what to do, my MIL already is trying to call our first daughter by her middle name (which is actually my MIL's name) but me and my husband are not letting that happen.
I just want to tell her to back off but we have a pretty rocky relationship anyway as we disagreed on a lot of stuff like about our wedding (even after almost four years), our house etc etc...
Has anybody else been in this situation? What did you do? Or what would you recommend to do? I know that it would be very hard to choose a name to please everybody.
March 22nd, 2014 07:29 AM #3
Hmm, well, she doesn't have a leg to stand on here. Every name you suggested is legitimate and not obscure in the slightest. It's not like you've made something up or concocted a crazy spelling. There's absolutely nothing to complain about. There're a lot of names in the world I don't like, but if they're real names I just get on with it.
Make it clear that she'll just have to lump it. For Sybil, perhaps suggest she watches the early series' of Downton Abbey to see it on a real person.
Last edited by renrose; March 22nd, 2014 at 07:33 AM.~Boys~
★ August Eli Benedict ★ Bram ★ Casimir Mordecai ★ Edmond John Meirion ★ Gillon ★
★ Jory Leander ★ Julian Charles ★ Macsen ★ Magnus ★ Vasiliy ★
★ Aira Rose ★ Arietta ★ Clover ★ Delphina ★ Eleni ★ Fiorella ★ Hester Isobel ★
★ Iris ★ Lilah ★ Merit ★ Sylvia ★
Sorry to anyone who read TSI. First draft was terrible. Second drafting now.
March 22nd, 2014 07:38 AM #5Senior Member
- Join Date
- Aug 2013
- Downton Abbey
Personally, I feel like she's being incredibly rude. Your choices are lovely. In all honesty, I like Charlotte, Lily and Violet (bored with Penelope, I see it everywhere on forums), but I like Cressida, Sybil, Bryony and Aoife as well. My mum and I both like Gertrude and Eugenie and Maude, where as my sister flat out refuses to say those 3 names.
It seems as though she likes to have control. Is your husband the only boy, or close to his mum? That could have something to do with it.
My aunties would try talking me out of almost every name on my list, they would approve of some classics, and the trendy ones, but if I were to say that I was having a little Freya or Ernest? Wouldnt end well.
Maybe try explaining to her that normal isnt your style, and you dont care what her other grandchildren are named. She had a chance to name babies, and I'm presuming she did it. Now it's your turn.Kirsty Emma Jayde ○ Poppy Lauren Grace ○ Ella Marigold Jayne ○ Rosie Charlotte Mae
Millie Florence Anne ○ Amelie Sophia Rose ○ Daisie Madeleine Eve ○ Honey Martha Jane
Thomas Aaron Michael ○ Jamie Alexander Rhys ○ Andrew Lachlan James ○ Daniel Patrick Joshua
Henry Christopher Louis ○ Matthew Edward John ○ Freddie Adam George ○ Charlie Bennett Joel
March 22nd, 2014 08:30 AM #7Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jun 2013
She might not like them because she simply hasn't heard of them before, or might be worried of the issue of spelling. It might not hurt as a previous poster mentioned to show her real life examples of these names being used. It might help to show her that they aren't so strange.
And as for Cressida, not only is it a lovely Shakespearean name....but theres a good chance it will be a name of a real life princess. (If prince Harry marries Cressida Bonas).
If she still is rude, then ignore her and choose the name you like anyway. I think she'll eventually get used to it.
March 22nd, 2014 12:35 PM #9
Go with name you and your husband like. It's not her business and you really should not let her telling you what you should do. Be loud and clear and polite (but still strong).
If she is try to call your daughter by her middle name, and you're really pissed, just taught your kid not to answer by her middle name. (Tell your kid to answer only by her first name.) I would really be pissed if my mother-in-law do that, because it matter of respect.