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  1. #6
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Location
    Texas
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    916
    I mostly agree with kala_way. Although I would add that gender and sex roles are more than sociocultural; they are a part of our nature. They're not incidental.

    I used to would have been right around where augusta_lee is on this issue but my thinking has, um, I'll say evolved. I have lived in San Francisco; I would no longer be very welcome there. I was rather radical Left as a youngster. I am now a conservative libertarian-ish Catholic.

    So come to think of it, rather than stir up a hornet's nest I think I'm gonna go find a different thread. :-)
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  2. #8
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    2,124
    I would never do that to a future child! How could you take a toy off them or prevent them from doing something that they loved? I was lucky growing up in that my parents never made me do 'girl' stuff, which suited me as a tomboy. I was allowed to play football and cricket just like the boys at my school, I spent most of my young life climbing trees and exploring, I never went to a dance class and I had just the one Barbie- she ended up in the bath, naked and missing a leg.

    I was thinking the other week about a kitchen set I had as a young girl which I totally loved and I said I'd probably get something similar for future kids- so I'd more likely buy things/introduce them to things that I enjoyed myself as a child, rather than thinking 'she's a girl therefore she must play with dolls'.

    One thing I really don't like with gender stereotyping is colour. Some people seem to dress their kids up in entirely pink or blue from the moment they're born and buy all the baby gear in the same colour. It's fine if they're a bit older and ask for it themselves, but when you see a mother dragging her little boy away from something he likes because it's pink/purple and they're 'girl colours'- that annoys me. It's also impractical, if you later go on to have a baby of the opposite gender. Plus what I've found odd recently is that I've seen some berries agreeing that everything will be 'gender neutral' for their future children, yet the names in their signatures are highlighted pink & blue :/

    But I agree with PPs that this is a complex topic. Pretty much this:

    Quote Originally Posted by kala_way View Post
    I think it's best to be mostly led by your child in things like this.
    Last edited by charlieandperry1; March 3rd, 2013 at 10:06 PM.
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  3. #10
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    California
    Posts
    7,052
    Quote Originally Posted by charlieandperry1 View Post
    One thing I really don't like with gender stereotyping is colour. Some people seem to dress their kids up in entirely pink or blue from the moment they're born and buy all the baby gear in the same colour.
    I personally dislike baby pink and baby blue, but I know for a lot of mothers it isn't exactly a choice. My sister was quite young when she had her first and most of her baby stuff was donated or borrowed or given to her at showers etc. When people hear that it's a girl, they buy pink. So despite the fact that she hated pink my sister had a closet full of pink clothes for her first daughter.

    Also, I know the reason a lot of people use the "expected" colors is so that they don't have to correct people all the time. It irritated my sister to no end when people would walk up and say, "Aww, your boy is so handsome!" Just because my niece was wearing jeans and a purple shirt. Apparently, if it's not in pink it's a boy, lol.

    I do agree with your point that forcing children away from certain color choices in toys is crazy.

    We were at a baseball game the other week and a father in front of us wouldn't by a cotton candy for his son because all the seller had left was pink! Seriously! It's candy, all strawberry/cherry/watermelon/raspberry/etc flavored candy is pink! Maybe he discourages the use of Pepto Bismol as well.
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  4. #12
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Posts
    1,823
    Quote Originally Posted by kala_way View Post
    I personally dislike baby pink and baby blue, but I know for a lot of mothers it isn't exactly a choice. My sister was quite young when she had her first and most of her baby stuff was donated or borrowed or given to her at showers etc. When people hear that it's a girl, they buy pink. So despite the fact that she hated pink my sister had a closet full of pink clothes for her first daughter.

    Also, I know the reason a lot of people use the "expected" colors is so that they don't have to correct people all the time. It irritated my sister to no end when people would walk up and say, "Aww, your boy is so handsome!" Just because my niece was wearing jeans and a purple shirt. Apparently, if it's not in pink it's a boy, lol.

    I do agree with your point that forcing children away from certain color choices in toys is crazy.

    We were at a baseball game the other week and a father in front of us wouldn't by a cotton candy for his son because all the seller had left was pink! Seriously! It's candy, all strawberry/cherry/watermelon/raspberry/etc flavored candy is pink! Maybe he discourages the use of Pepto Bismol as well.
    I definitely agree, and the cotton candy thing is ridiculous! But I think people go to far with it. Yes, girls shouldn't have to be in pink, but it should be acceptable if they are (and boys as well). It seems as if both genders are pushed to be more masculine.
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  5. #14
    Join Date
    Feb 2013
    Location
    Sydney Australia
    Posts
    1,803
    Quote Originally Posted by kala_way View Post
    I'm half and half on this because I can see it being taken too far in both directions.

    Boys dancing? totally. awesome and fantastic, not a huge deal.
    Boys being encouraged to wear dresses? not so much.

    Girls playing with trucks? wonderful and great!
    Girls being pushed into tough sports when they don't enjoy them and aren't good at them? no.

    There are in fact gender and sex roles in our society as much as some people don't want to acknowledge them, teaching your children to ignore them may broaden their minds but will also make for a lot of difficult teasing and questions earlier than they may be able to truly handle.

    I think it's best to be mostly led by your child in things like this. If you let them walk around the toy store and pick anything they want, if they pick a truck or a doll--get it for them, who cares whether they're a boy or girl. But don't try to make a point to other people by making your kid an example.
    I have to say I agree with this view. People often take it a little too far! Having studied how some parents are choosing to raise their kids Gender Neutral. Some parents need to really think about how this will affect their child's future.
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