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Thread: Ttc 2013
August 28th, 2013 09:25 AM #2486Junior Member
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- Aug 2013
@Alzora, my heart is breaking for you. I know this TTC game is horrible. I haven't been trying as long but I know the feelings of despair and helplessness when the whole world seems to be pregnant around you. I'm glad you have such a wonderful and supportive husband, it is important to turn to each other and rely on each other. I am hoping for good news from you this cycle- it isn't over till its over.
Don't apologize about being a downer, it is important not to keep such feelings bottled up inside. If you can't share here- then where else can you do it?
August 28th, 2013 10:32 AM #2488Member
- Join Date
- Jun 2013
Alzora--I understand completely. And I am so sorry. It sounds like your husband will make an amazing dad, and you a wonderful mom. I'm confident that will happen-- especially once you're able to get the medical attention you may need.
We've also been trying 13 months although we did technically conceive once, for all the good it did us. And August is looking like a bust. I really wanted a May baby ( Mayby?).
August 28th, 2013 12:08 PM #2490Senior Member
- Join Date
- Aug 2013
Alzora- I am so sorry that you are struggling so much right now. I know that it is a hard journey and it seems like there is no hope. But you are very blessed to have an amazing husband to go through this with and friends that you can also open up to. I am praying for you and I hope that you can soon find comfort, from where ever that may come. I have hope that you will eventually concieve and prove that all of this time that you spent feeling lower than low, will be completely worth it!!
August 28th, 2013 12:51 PM #2492
This group should win an award for being the most supportive support group. I think one of the best qualities of this thread is that you are all such great listeners. And as you all know for yourselves, when a woman is trying to conceive and fighting with all of the hormones and emotions that go along with that, she sometimes just needs someone to listen, and you all nailed it. That's what makes this thread so successful. I appreciate you ladies so much.
@Daisychain, so funny that you used the term Mayby! Every time I think about the possibility of a May baby, my weird little brain smooshes the two words together and is like, "A Mayby!"
I've gotten some more sleep (Wednesday is my do-nothing day, falling right in between my house-cleaning days and my newspaper-assignment days), and I'm feeling a bit more reasonable about some things. As several of you keep trying to tell me, this cycle isn't over. I know I said that I won't discuss symptoms this cycle, but we all knew that would be short-lived: I'm 8 or 9 DPO and am having premenstrual cramps, which started on Sunday (6 DPO), I feel the usual tension in my legs and knees that I get the week before my period, and my cervix has had it's usual weird crampy feeling. So all of that sounds incredibly discouraging, and I have zero pregnancy symptoms. But as Blade once pointed out in this thread, all of that is caused by progesterone, which would be spiking at this point in my cycle with or without pregnancy. Knowing that, I don't know why I'm so pessimistic about things. I think it's just hard (or scary?) to hold out hope when you feel for all the world like your period is on the brink of starting. The next few days should be very telling, but even so, like you all said, it's not over 'til it's over.
And I know that if my period comes, my mood swings will settle down, AND it will FINALLY be September, so I will be on my husband's insurance! I still don't have the money to pursue the test that I need to see if my fallopian tubes are blocked (the test is between $2,500-4,000, and insurance covers 80% of that but the remaining 20% is still a good chunk of money...probably will not happen until after the holidays). However, I see no reason why we can't schedule a consultation with a fertility specialist to get the ball rolling, find out pricing on things, have her look over my medical history, and discuss the possibility of a semen analysis for my husband (which is far more affordable).
I just need to take a deep breath and focus on positive things. Hormones get the best of me.mid-20s . married to my best friend . trying for our first
Though my soul may set in darkness, it will rise in glorious light.
I have loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night.
August 28th, 2013 01:45 PM #2494
@Alzora - You totally never need to apologize for being emotional on here. TTC is a crazy roller-coaster ride even without the health issues you've had in the past. We are all here whenever you need to vent. I hope you're able to get a consultation and at least talk about the next steps... although I hope even more than you won't need it after all. :-)
My doctor's office phoned to confirm that I'm not pregnant, but otherwise things are positive as my blood work is good. So I guess I'll be going for a "Mayby" as well!Estella ~ Helena ~ Miriam ~ Beatrice ~ Anastasia ~ Ruby ~ Ivy ~ MarillaPaul ~ Wesley ~ Walter ~ Martin ~ Edmund ~ Fraser ~ Alexander
Trying for baby#1
Avatar: Nathan Altman, Portrait of Anna Akhmatova