Results 6 to 10 of 44
August 20th, 2012 06:26 PM #6
I am 21, but I will still be in my twenties when we have a child. I don't think my views will change, they have only gotten worse thanks to my friends. One took a class related to pregnancy and told me horrible stories of the baby breaking bones due to kicking hard.... she actually says that surrogacy is a much better option since pregnancy basically "destroys" the body. Before I was leaning towards possibly being pregnant, but thanks to her, I am now leaning more towards adoption/surrogacy.
August 20th, 2012 06:26 PM #8Senior Member
- Join Date
- Dec 2011
There will be changes and I don't want to be rude, but if you aren't willing to make some physical sacrifices then I believe you are not ready to have children. I used to feel the same way then one day it just became a non-issue, I was ready for whatever nature was going to give me. I changed my mind when I was about 25 (because news flash, your body will change baby or not). The way I see it is, in order to have a child and truly care for it you should be ready willing to give up anything for that child. Surrogacy IMO is not for women looking to keep their tummies in tact, it's for women who are physically incapable of carrying a child safely. There is nothing wrong with adoption either but I feel you are considering it for the wrong reasons. I'd recommend just really thinking about why body image is your reason for not wanting to have your own child, and if its something you're not willing to sacrifice or work on before, during and after pregnancy, then is having a child what you really want? I feel as though you are still too selfish or self involved to have another person dependent on you. Honestly, I have never heard anyone but you say pregnant women are just "fat". MANY women do not gain unneeded body fat during pregnancy. If your mind doesn't change I sincerely hope you chose to not have children and enjoy your life for yourself. I said sincerely because I mean that in a kind way.
Last edited by tinabina; August 20th, 2012 at 06:29 PM.Mama to Arden Skye (02/2013)
August 20th, 2012 06:39 PM #10
After reading your response to my post, I've got to say that I agree with tinabina. It sounds like you have a lot of issues (body and otherwise) that you need to work out before having children (if you do decide that you even want them). What you're describing sounds like some kind of severe fear/paranoia and you should really address that before making any final decisions on having kids. Not wanting anyone to see you while pregnant is very extreme, not to mention not very practical. How would you even do that? Quit your job right away and not leave the house or talk to anyone for nine months?
August 20th, 2012 06:39 PM #12
I actually don't have body issues. I think I look pretty good, but I can't help but see a pregnant woman and automatically think "she's fat/huge!" I just have such a negative connotation towards pregnant women. My friend even says pregnant women freak her out so I'm not the only one.
Last edited by catloverd; August 20th, 2012 at 06:51 PM.
August 20th, 2012 06:42 PM #14