I think I've gone cross-eyed trying to read this whole thread at once. In any case, I saw that someone suggested Crimson, but the OP never commented on it, so I'll suggest it again. I have a 12 year old named Crimson, and I've met other ones, but it's a freak thing because if you look at the social security data, there are very very few named this in the entire country in any given year. It doesn't lend itself to nicknames or spelling questions and she gets compliments all the time. I figure since the name I've chosen for my baby that is due in a couple weeks is already on your short list (Starling) then maybe you'd also like Crimson. My Crimson did end up with the nn "Coco" from a younger sib who just couldn't say her name and then it stuck, but no one outside of family calls her that. She's just Crimson, and she likes her name! For the record, before I had her, I got comments like "that makes me think of blood" and "that sounds like a streetwalker" or "she'll be on the pole someday" but now that she exists, she's the only one of my kids who gets constant compliments on her name and she's got a rather serious nature yet still feels like her name fits her.

My only other suggestions would be Blessing or Tamsin. As long as you are in the US, you won't be hearing either of those anywhere.